Angel In The Night
by jewlzncoolz
Summary: Visited by a mysterious man at the age of 9, Bella is stunned when he returns 8 yrs later when she is 17. She is instantly captured by him - all beauty & mystery filled. But her angel is far from a saint - will she be able to overlook that fact?
1. Chapter One

**Title: **Angel In The Night.

_**Summary:**_ Bella Swan was once visited by a mystery man in the middle of the night when she was nine years old. Now that she is seventeen, he visits her again. Every night, they meet in the darkness and soon she starts to fall in love with him. But what she doesn't know is that her angel in the night is far from a saint.

Author's Note: This story will be a little slow, mostly because I don't want to rush the characters. I don't mean to offend anyone by anything I write, so please ignore anything that might be offensive. The story is dedicated to my friend **_iw2lu4ever._**

Hope you enjoy :)

* * *

Chapter one. The Mystery visit.

_Nine years old. (October 15__th__ 2001) _

**Bella's POV.**

I sat up bolt upright and blinked. My room came into sight immediately. But the dream… it was so vivid. It all looked so real. It _had_ been real. So real that my heart was hammering against my chest loudly. I also realised that I was breathing pretty hard and my clothes were drenched in sweat. _Ew_.

"Stupid Bella", I muttered to myself, clenching my teeth together. I tried to slow down my breathing but still I felt hot. Throwing the bed sheets aside to the right, I got off the left side of my bed and walked towards the window.

This was the second night I had slept in this room. I had only moved in with my new adopted parents two nights ago. The house was massive with five bedrooms and turned out that it was built back in the late 1800s.

My room was average size with a large cupboard right opposite my twin-sized bed. I had a desk with a chair and two drawer tables on either side of my bed.

My new adoptive parents were great, Renée and Charlie Swan. They were the best kindest people I knew. Renée was fun all the time and you could always count on her for a laugh.

I had known her my entire life because she was actually best friends with my mom. She owned her own flower business and had just opened a new flower shop in the grey town of Forks.

Charlie, on the other hand, was a quiet and serious man. He was one of those people who weren't very good at expressing their emotions verbally. That was fine with me. He was the chief of police in Forks.

I loved Charlie and Renée and loved them even more for the fact that they had adopted me. I couldn't imagine anyone else to…well, not to replace my parents but…

I sighed.

No matter how many loving parents I would have, the nightmares would keep coming. They would keep me awake. They would haunt me until I went crazy with the horrible images that flooded my closed eyelids.

"Stupid, stupid Bella", I muttered to myself again. I yanked up the window frame as high as it would go. The cold fresh air hit my face. It felt good. The moon was big and shone brightly outside.

I padded back quickly towards my bed and shivered under the covers from the cold wind that was now blowing in. Sighing once more, I closed my eyes.

My eyes hadn't been closed very long and I knew I wouldn't be getting to sleep. Biting my bottom lip, I pondered whether I should stay here and try to sleep or get Renée to help me. She had always told me to come to her when I had nightmares. Not _if _I had a nightmare, but _when_. Because she knew that I did have disturbing nightmares.

A soft thud made me freeze.

Slowly, I sat up. My eyes suddenly widened as I witness the scene in front of me. The sight was unbelievable to even consider. A man stood in the middle of my room in a defensive crouching position.

He wasn't facing me; he was facing my door, which was the opposite place where the window was. I could only imagine that he had crept in through the window.

He had glowing pale skin that looked hard and uneasy to penetrate. He was very tall, so much so that I had to look way up. He wore no shirt but a mere ragged pair of black shorts. His chest looked like it was carved by the way the lines was smoothly shaped.

I could only see all of his beauty because of the moon, which gave me a slight light. I couldn't see perfect everything but only a basic outline. My breath hitched and his eyes flickered at me.

My heart sped up and my lips parted. The man's face was beautiful. I had never seen someone look so angelic and uniquely breath taking. I could see his soft hair sticking up at odd ends even through the darkness. His eyes were a soft, yet piercing shade of green.

I was speechless. My mind wouldn't co-operate at that moment. I only watched as the angel in my room frowned slightly. He cocked his head to the left as he stared at me for a couple of minutes. Frustration covered his face and his eyes narrowed.

I wanted to speak. To ask this beautiful stranger what he was doing in my room at such an hour. To question him on his beauty. I wanted to know how he came into my room; did he really climb up to my window?

But I couldn't speak at all. My voice had been snatched away.

The stranger's eyes suddenly widened. In a movement that was too fast for my eyes he had suddenly disappeared and reappeared in the middle of my room. Yet his eyes stayed glued to mine.

I watched as he bent down slowly, as if not to scare me, his left hand stroked the brown floorboards underneath his feet. Then suddenly in a quick flash and a silence shift, he had ripped off a piece of the floorboard that his fingers had been caressing. I merely continued to watch him, amazed. I could do nothing else.

My angel's lips parted but he said no words. He tore away our held gaze and now looked at the space where the floorboard had been. I looked too, only to be amazed even more.

There was a small gap and inside it was a blue box. The man reached in and picked out the blue box. He stroked it gently then replaced the floorboard where it was.

In another quick movement, the man was now standing by the window with his back to me. My eyes racked over where he had snatched the floorboard away, it looked in perfect condition. I was utterly confused.

How did a blue small box end up being in my room? How come I didn't know of this?

"Sleep, little girl", a velvety voice crooned.

The voice alone was enough to make me breathless. It was a perfect sound, a soft and soothing orchestra of the best musical instruments played at the same time. It was layered in folds of smooth silk and hypnotic sparkles.

The man turned around slowly, clutching the blue box in his hands at his chest. He offered me a smile, a perfect smile. His eyes glittered.

"Sleep", he whispered once more, before he turned and vanished through my window.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter two: My Odd Life.

_Seventeen years old_. **Bella's POV.**

The tears escaped my eyes slowly. I sat up and brought my knees closer. Burying my head between my knees and chest, I sobbed quietly. The nightmares would never end. They would never go away. The vivid images would continue to haunt me for the rest of my life. I was surely end up being alone because of this.

There was once upon a time when I dreamt happy dreams. When I didn't have to worry about going to sleep. Once upon a time. That was years ago now. It was another lifetime. When everything was happy. When my parents were still alive.

I wiped my tears away with the back of my hand and stood up. Every night when I had these pictures haunt me I would always do one thing. Open the window.

I would open the window of my room, hoping desperately that I would get the dream that I had gotten so many years ago. A dream of an Angel, a Mystery Man, a Superhero, and Peter Pan whatever you want to call him. I wish so much that I could have that dream again. I had dreamt that he had come to my room. He was here, in my room and he had spoken to me. My imagination was so wild when I was little.

He was so perfect, though I knew him for a couple of minutes and only through a dream. Though I didn't know who he was, I knew that he was perfect. I opened the window up as high as it would go. Then I wondered slowly back onto my bed.

After a couple of minutes without sleeping I got up again and headed to the bathroom. I brushed my teeth for no reason again. I didn't want to go back so instead I just stood in front of the body length mirror and stared at myself. My hair was messy as usual.

I had long waist length brown hair with matching eyes. My skin was an odd pale colour and I was pretty slim. I was never an object of desire or attention in my school. In fact I barely got any dates and was happy with that.

At school, I had my best friend Jacob to occupy me and make me laugh. Jacob had been the dream best friend that anyone would want. We were the perfect example that boys and girls could be friends without any feelings getting involved.

Jacob was tall with copper brown beautiful skin. His hair was shoulder length, straight and silky black. He was a great friend. The only friend I had actually.

I ran my fingers through my hair briefly then gave up. It was the middle of the night. No one would see me now.

I padded slowly back into my room and shut the door. Just as I turned around, I got the biggest surprise of my life.

**Edward's POV.**

I could never stay in one place for so long. I didn't know how the others did it. They had chosen to start a life in Forks, Washington two years ago. I knew that I couldn't do it.

Carlisle was working at the local hospital. He was posing to be 29 years old with his wife Esme who was 28. Emmett and Rosalie were both posing 23 year olds and Rosalie Hale was English teacher while Emmett McCarthy was a gym teacher.

Alice and Jasper were both 22 year olds who were to volunteer at the library and the local shelter. They decided to move here two years ago in 2007 whilst I roamed the earth.

That was their way of blending in with the humans. We weren't humans and I think they should've accepted that. Of course, I liked our diet. I didn't want to be monster and drinking animal blood instead of human blood didn't make me feel so bad.

Unlike the Cullens, supposedly my family, I couldn't stay in one place for more than a couple of days. It made me feel uncomfortable. Forks was the original town that I was born in. in 1901 was the year my mother gave birth to me. When I was 15, in the year 1916 she died of cancer. She handed me two blue velvet boxes before she died.

I buried it in my room, under the floorboards. She told me not to look at what was inside until I had found my other self. I obeyed, not knowing what her words meant.

I went to live in Chicago with my father and his new wife in the year 1918, when I was seventeen years old. However much I wanted to fight in the Great War, my father forbad me; he said he didn't want to loose me, because he had already lost my mother. The Spanish flu epidemic hit Chicago in the year 1920, and that was how I was changed. Frozen at nineteen forever.

Eight years ago, early October 2001, a muddy human memory flickered across my mind. It was the one when my mother gave me the blue boxes. So I travelled to Forks, coming straight to my old house, surprised to see it still standing. It was just as I had remembered except now it had been remodernized in certain places.

Without hesitation, I climbed up the left side of the house, heading straight for the window of my room. I could hear the mind of two people inside, dreaming away.

As soon as I entered, I froze, surprised to see what was in front of me. A girl, around the age of eight or nine years old sat bolt upright on a double sized bed. Her big chocolate eyes were widened and curious. Her lips were parted as she breathed in unsteadily. Her heart was thrashing against her ribcage as if it was threatening to burst out.

Her scent hit me like a storm. A strong fragrance of strawberries and a hint of freesias. Her blood was also strong but I chose to ignore that for my own benefit no matter how temptingly sweet the scent was.

I waited.

Nothing.

_What_?

I frowned, staring at her. Nothing.

I concentrated harder.

…_Don't think we should be doing this but maybe…_

…_Come on, hurry up…_

…_Midnight snack tonight, they're all sleeping and…_

I blinked, staring intently at the girl in front of me. She continued to stare back, not speaking, just staring. Her eyes traced over my body then flickered back to my eyes. She made no move to scream or run or anything.

And the weirdest thing: her mind was blank.

I frowned again, focusing intently into her mind. I could hear the dreams of the other two people in the house, but not hers. Why not?

Her breath slowed as she continued to watch me. I straightened up.

I was here for something. If the girl wasn't going to go running to her mommy, all the better for me. I flitted to the seventh floorboard by the window, still cautiously watching out for the little girl. She continued to watch, doing nothing else.

I pulled the board back and scooped up what I was here for. The box had survived, dusty and old now. But it was there. I flitted back to the window, about to launch myself out of the window but then I remembered the girl. She was so quiet it's like she wasn't even there. I waited for a couple of seconds to see if I could hear anything at all. Frustration got the better of me.

"Sleep, little girl", I said, without looking back. She didn't even twitch. I turned to face her, smiling when I saw her face was just as it had been when I had first gotten in. "sleep."

And with that, I crouched and sprung out of the window, leaping into the darkness of the night.

--

Of course, that was years ago. Eight years ago. When I had the box, it stayed with me wherever I went. I visited my family, the Cullens as often as I could and then they told me that they would be moving to forks for a couple of years. I turned my head and didn't accompany them. Instead, I continued my journey, wandering around aimlessly and totally alone.

Another muddy memory washed over me two years after my family moved to forks. It was the same that I had had, but this time I remembered that my mother gave me two boxes. Two small blue boxes. And I remembered hiding both of them, but I only had one.

So then 2009, I travelled to Forks once more, visiting my family in the process of course. They had settled in well. I almost envied them. Esme silently begged me with her eyes to settle down with them. I didn't know what to say to her. I graciously accepted to stay for a couple of days. But I had one mission here.

I ran through the thick forest, heading in one direction. Where I had been eight years ago. I stopped at the large house and waited. I had remembered the last time I was here and didn't want to be taken off by surprised. I listened and heard three people breathing, but I could only hear two minds. The same from eight years ago. So they hadn't moved, that meant the little girl hadn't either.

I felt slightly frustrated at the fact that the little girl's thought was still blank from me. I climbed up the side of the house and stopped outside the window, it was opened. But the girl wasn't inside.

The bed was unmade and I could smell her scent easily. Fresh. She had been her a few minutes ago. As I stepped inside, I decided to hurry and get what I came here for. I frowned as I deciphered which floorboard to look under once more. I knew exactly where the last box was, but this memory was slightly cloudy. Like looking through a hazy pair of glasses. Of course my eyesight was perfect, so trying to remember and seeing things blurry only made me even more frustrated.

I bent down in irritation and ripped out three floorboards at once. Nothing but dust. I replaced them smoothly. I moved to the left, ripping three more in the process as I did so.

Fully angered now, I bent down and sniffed.

Freesia, strawberries, dust, denim, wool, polyester, chocolate, wood, metal…

I smelt the blue box that I had with me, strengthening my senses before I went back to sniffing through the floorboards. But then I froze.

Freesia and strawberries. Too strong.

In an instant movement, I flashed to my defensive crouch as I was alerted by my senses that I wasn't alone. How incredibly ridiculous of me! I relied on my gift of hearing thoughts too much, knowing that I would know if someone was approaching by hearing their thoughts. But this girl I couldn't hear.

I looked.

And I was awed.

She was no longer the little girl that I had seen all those years ago. She had the similar features of course. Her frame was taller. Her body more grown up, looking more like a woman than a girl. Her hair was brown and cascaded gently down her back, reaching her waist. Her eyes were wide and beautiful, a light chocolate colour in a magnificent swirl. Her cheekbones appraised her face. Her lips were curved and pink and full.

Her body had developed and blossomed beautifully as far as I could see. She wore a pair of light blue shorts that showed her long creamy legs perfectly. The curves of her body were like the masterpiece of a true artist.

The small blue vest top that hung close to her skin was absolutely a complimentary colour, highlighting the soft and pale shade of her skin tone. I couldn't help but let my eyes wander on the swell of her breasts and the flushing piece of skin below her neckline.

"You're real," she breathed. She didn't run. She didn't scream. She closed the door of her room, her eyes locked on mine. Her voice was a melody, echoing in my head.

Once again, I could hear nothing from her. Like her mind was forbidden to me. Her breathing was unsteady and her heart rate was quite high.

I was utterly confused by her reactions.


	3. Chapter Three

Chapter three. My Angel.

**Edward's POV.**

Once again, I could hear nothing from her. Like her mind was forbidden to me. Her breathing was unsteady and her heart rate was quite high.

I was utterly confused by her reactions.

"Y-you're real", she whispered again. It was as if she was confirming it to herself. What did she mean? Did she remember from all those years ago? I doubted that a fragile human like her would remember. She was only young and probably thought it was all a dream.

My fingers stroked the floorboard underneath me. She didn't look at the movement of my fingers. She looked at me. Somehow it felt like she was looking deep inside me with the chocolate orbs of hers.

I bent down, determined to get what I came for and get out. Because not only did this girl amaze me, she also terrified me.

I didn't understand why I couldn't hear her and I didn't understand why she wasn't scared of me. Her heartbeat was returning to normal, like it did last time.

"Y-you are real, aren't you?" she said again. Did she expect me to answer that? How do you answer a question like that?

What should I say?

_Yes, I am real. So…what's up?_

_No, I'm not. You're having a dream._

More like a nightmare.

I sniffed for the last time as my senses caught what I was looking for. I ripped off the floorboard, my eyes never leaving the sight in front of me, just in case she was planning on running away.

My fingers touched the velvety material of the box I came here for. I looked down, just for a second, to make sure that was it. Yes. I scooped it up and looked back up again.

The girl had moved.

She took a step closer to me. I watched, confused, as she held up her hand. She was reaching out to me, as she slowly edged.

Her heart rate was speeding once more. I hoped that meant she was scared. But it didn't look like it. She was moving closer. I was awed. Why was she coming closer? Did she want to touch me? To feel if I was real? Wasn't she scared at all?

Vampires normally had a certain intimidating reactions to humans. They would sense that we were dangerous. They normally gave us a bubble of space, they kept away instinctually.

The girl approached.

As she came closer, I could smell her scent stronger. I could practically feel the warmth of her skin radiating off of her as she came even closer. She wasn't sweating bullets to show her fear; did she have any fear in her at all?

I didn't dare move. I couldn't. I was frozen in a state as I watched this brave human girl whom I could do so much damage to in so little time.

But she intrigued me. She fascinated me. She made me curious and I mused to myself without answers.

I felt, very gently, as the tip of her fingers touched my hair. I stayed still in my position, on my knees in front of the goddess before my sight. She took another shy step, hitting me with her strong fragrance and the mouth-watering scent of her warm blood.

I swallowed back the venom in my mouth and focused. No, it wouldn't be good to bite her now. The monster inside of me raged fought. Her blood was sweet, a perfect dose, and a cure to my undying thirst.

No. I held my breath to stop myself from inhaling anymore of her beautiful scent.

The girl breathed out gently, her fingers entwined themselves with the locks of my hair. I looked up at her, as she looked back down at me. As her breath hit my face, I could smell mint and toothpaste. She had brushed her teeth.

"You were here", the girl whispered again, her eyes smouldering into mine, "it wasn't a dream…you were really here."

She remembered.

**Bella's POV.**

He was an Angel. Surely he was. He wasn't Peter Pan, he wasn't wearing tights or anything and I couldn't see any pixies around. He was more than a man. That was obvious. If he was real, he wasn't human. I knew that. His beauty was beyond human genes.

I didn't know if this was another dream or if it was real. But it felt pretty real right now. I stared down at the beautiful green eyes of my Angel. How long had I dreamed of this day. How many times had I wondered whether I would see him again?

Yet, there he was. The same Angel that had visited me all those years ago. The same green eyes. The same odd coloured hair. Never aging, never less than perfect. He looked exactly the same as he had.

This time, my Angel wore a dark purple short-sleeved shirt and some casual jeans. I found my stomached tightening and swirling pleasantly as my fingers knotted freely into his hair. He was on his knees, another blue box in his hand, from underneath the floorboards of my room. I wondered how many more were under there. And how did he know they'd be there?

As we stared at eachother so intently, I had so many questions in my head once more. And this time I could actually form coherent sentences so I decided to ask him the question that was running through my mind the most.

"Am I dreaming?" I asked him. My voice came out as barely a whisper. His mouth curved up into a crooked grin that almost made my knees buckle. My heart took off again, beating and thrashing inside of me.

He moved and I yanked my hand back immediately and took a step back. The Mystery Angel, still smiling faintly, pocketed the blue box and rose to his feet.

He was taller than me. Very much taller. I was only a mere 5 foot four inches and he looked to be over six foot. I lifted my chin up to keep our unbroken eye lock. I could feel myself getting lost in those green oceans.

"I think I may be dreaming", he spoke and once again his voice took me off guard, making me almost swoon. It was the smoothest, most silky voice I had ever heard in my life. It had a male, deep tone to it too.

I was breathless.

"If it were possible", he murmured in a quieter voice. I didn't know what he meant by that and I didn't care. I was too lost in his eyes, his beauty and his perfect attire to notice if world war three occurred right around me.

I was staring deeply into his eyes, the one-minute and the next he had disappeared. He flashed and reappeared suddenly at my window. I was so surprised by the movement that I stumbled back, but fortunately didn't fall.

"Wait", I called out, noticing how croaky and pleading my voice sounded. The Angel didn't move. He was frozen, one foot on the sill of my window about to jump out and the other still in my room. His back was to me as he looked out into the night.

"W-will you be back?" I asked, breathlessly, praying and hoping that if there were ever a God he would send this Angel to me again.

"Not if I can help it", he muttered, and suddenly, he was gone.

It felt like a bus hit me as his words registered and sunk in. I frowned, feeling my heart being suddenly ripped out and slashed at with a pocketknife.

He didn't want to come back.

_Not if I can help it._

So if he could help it, he wouldn't be returning. I ran towards the window, desperately looking out to see any sign of him. Unfortunately, the dark blinded me and I could only see outlines of a few things.

No Angels.

--

**Edward's POV.**

I had the two boxes that I came here for. Now, I needed to leave. I desperately needed to leave Forks and never return. I couldn't come back. I couldn't. No matter how much I wanted to feel the soft fingers of a human entwined in my hair again. No matter how much I wanted to know about her. No matter now much she intrigued and made me wanted to find out everything about her.

I ran through the forest, flashing softly in between the trees too fast for human sight. I followed my own scent back to the Cullen's house where I would be staying for a few days.

Then I would leave.

As I got closer to the house, the thoughts of my family greeted me. I was sure they could hear me approaching right now.

_…In conclusion, Mmm…Jacob Black is an acceptable student. Eh, I'll give him a B- based on his essay…hey Edward. You took your time._

Rosalie was upstairs marking the essays of her English class. She was a very severe and strict teacher in school.

…_That's right Emmett…you secretly have a crush on one of your students…_

I chuckled at Jasper tricks. Being able to control someone's emotion was quite a gift. I could say that it was better than my own. My gift felt especially useless tonight. I hadn't heard her approach. Maybe if I had Jasper's power, I'd be able to feel what she felt. Maybe I'd be able to put some fear into the poor girl. Then would she have kept her distance from me?

_…What? I'm in love with Marcia? Why do I…oh, Jasper's grinning again?_

…_Damn it, I can feel realisation from Emmett. Better leg it!_

I heard a little scramble coming from the second floor. No wonder that it was Emmett tackling Jasper to the ground.

_… Great, the boys are fighting again…blue goes with that light green…maybe some – Edward, dear. You're back…_

I followed Esme's voice with led me to our living room. As soon as I entered the house, I heard several sharp breath intakes.

Esme looked up at me with wide eyes.

…_Human?_

_…Get a whiff of that…what have you been doing tonight, Eddie-boy…_

Emmett and Jasper flitted down from upstairs, both looking curious too. Rosalie descended with fierceness and anger in her eyes.

"You've been mingling with humans?" asked Esme with curiosity. I felt taken back by her question.

"I…no", I answered her.

"I can smell it", said Rosalie through clenched teeth, narrowing her eyes off of me, "tell me you didn't?"

Her mind flashed a picture of me sucking dry the blood of an innocent human being. I felt rage at her distrust.

"No, I didn't", I told her.

"It's a human scent, Edward", said Jasper pointing out the obvious. Before I could defend myself, Rosalie flitted to my side and started sniffing my clothes. She lifted up herself on her toes as her nose was led directly to my hair.

_…I know that scent from somewhere before…_

"Why would a human touch your hair?" Emmett asked, quirking an eyebrow.

That was the question that I had been asking myself all along. Why would that girl touch y hair? Touch any part of me? It wasn't logical. She wasn't logical herself. It wasn't right. Humans stayed away from us, they shied away. Yet, this utterly beautiful fragile girl approached me.

_What are you confused about, Edward?_

I turned to Jasper and shook my head at him.

_Bet you got laid_. Emmett grinned at me knowingly.

"You spent the night with a little human girl, didn't ya?" he winked at me, before laughing out loud.

_As if._ I glared at Rosalie's thoughts.

"No, Emmett. I didn't", I told him, "I went to get the box that I needed like I told you guys."

_I've smelt something like that…it's not…oh? Is it? I'm sure that…it is her…_

Rosalie smirked at me oddly and sniffed my hair once more. I moved away from her, stepping back.

"Then why do you _stink_ of Isabella Swan?" she asked me suspiciously.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter four: Fighting With Myself.

**Bella's POV.**

"Bells? _Bella_! Oh for the love of –"

"Mr Black, can you please turn around _this_ instant?"

I was suddenly distracted from my thoughts as a hand suddenly landed on my table. I jumped, and then blushed.

Everyone in the class had turned to look at me. Apart from a scowling Jacob who was muttering profanities under his breath.

"Miss Swan, are you alright?" asked Mr Banner, looking at me warily. He approached cautiously as if I was contagious or something. I blinked as my eyes reacted the lights on the ceiling.

"Um, fine", I muttered trying to ignore the stares and whispers of everyone around me.

"Are you sure?" He asked, arching an eyebrow, "you look awfully, er, flushed…"

"I'm fine", I muttered again. He nodded once and turned back to explain the rest of the biology lesson. Once his back was turned towards the class, Jacob turned on me. He was sitting in front of me, paired up with a girl called Leah. I felt sorry for him.

"What was _that_?" he hissed, narrowing his eyes at me. I stared at him, stunned.

"What are you talking about?" I asked, innocently. He rolled his eyes.

"You were off in your own world all of this morning", he explained, twisting his chair so that he was facing me fully, "and then you were mumbling about some angels."

"Oh…I didn't realise", I whispered to him, shrugging it off.

"Are you alright Bella?" Jake asked cautiously.

"Fine", I told him, nodding firmly.

I took in a deep breath and tried to concentrate for the rest of the lesson, trying desperately to not let my mind wander around what had happened last night.

What _had_ happened last night?

Was it a dream? It couldn't be. I couldn't have dreamt of _him_ again. Could I? All those years ago, I had dreamt of something so perfect, so fairy tale. Something that only happened in films and books and fan fictions.

But then again, he felt so real. He looked so real. I wanted him to be real so much.

Apart from the last thing that he had said. He didn't want to return. I was sure that if I dreamt of an angel, that he would say something much nicer to me. Or if he were angel then god would've taught him better manners.

Great, now I was arguing about angels in my head. Angels didn't exist.

Then who _was_ the green-eyed man who spoke to me the previous night?

"You're spacing off on me again, Bella", said a bored voice. I blinked, realising than I was now walking towards Jake's car. He was leading me by the hand and glancing at me weirdly. I blushed slightly at the people who were eyeing Jacob and I. We didn't _normally_ hold hands.

School went by quick.

Wow, so quick.

"What is your name?" asked Jacob, narrowing his eyes as he opened the door of his Blue Mercedes for me. Since when was Jacob the perfect gentleman, holding doors open?

"Bella", I told him rolling my eyes.

"I'm not so sure", he mumbled, slamming the door and jogging to the other side, "I think you've been adopted by a couple of aliens and they've done some sort of body swap."

I glared at him for a couple of seconds and rolled my eyes at his childishness.

"I'm fine Jake", I assured him. Just thinking about the strange man who was in my room yesterday, that's all. _Right_.

"Well…sure", he said eyeing suspicious as the engine started, "so why did Miss Hale call you after class in English?"

"I don't know", I told him truthfully. It was sort of odd. My English teacher, Miss Beautiful Hale, had asked me to stay behind after class. I went to her when class had finished but she just sniffed like she had a bad cold and then dismissed me.

To be honest, I was kind of scared of her. She was the only one really young and beautiful female teacher in our school. All guys thought she was hot but a rumour was going around that she was dating Mr McCarty, the gym teacher.

Mr McCarty was a tall burly man with so much muscles, it almost looked illegal. Not to mention the fact that most girls had a massive crush on him. He suited Miss Hale perfectly. They both had the same odd aura around them. Their beauty was exceptional and they gave off a strange spaced vibe.

"Well, what did she say?" Jake pressed on curiously. I merely shrugged. My head was too full with impossible things right now. I couldn't be bothered to think about Miss Beautiful Hale.

I was starting to wonder if I was crazy.

--

I blinked.

Jacob's face was inches from mine. It was tilted to the right and my best friend had a slow smirk spreading across his face.

"Boo", he whispered gently.

Of course, I jumped away, screaming out a scared yelp and clutching my heart. Jacob chuckled, shaking his head.

"Jake, what the hell?" I snapped, pushing him back and stumbling out of his car. Jacob continued to laugh, grabbing my school bag and handing it over to me.

"You had the weirdest, blank look on your face", he laughed, "It was hilarious, Bells. Seriously, what's wrong? Why have you been so distant today?"

Towards the end of his questions, he almost sounded concerned. Jake and I didn't have any secrets and it made me feel bad to not tell him what was bothering me. Another side of me _did_ want to open up to him. He was my friend, my best friend. Surely he would understand. Or think I was mental.

I rolled my eyes and shrugged.

"Well, we've got that geography poster to get done today", he carried on chatting happily, "so let's go. It's due in school tomorrow."

We went into the house and Jacob headed straight to my kitchen, I followed him. I shook my head, trying to clear my thoughts. I didn't want to be thinking of that man again. It wasn't healthy. I _must_ have made him up. Logic explained that he wasn't real. I dreamt him up. He couldn't exist.

But _why_ did he say he wouldn't come back?

I racked my brains all day today, focusing on nothing but his smooth voice, his unique beauty and what he had said. He didn't want to come back, I concluded. I dreamt him up. I _made_ him up. And he didn't want to come back…

"Want anything?" said Jacob, sticking his head into my fridge. He pulled out two cans of coke and slid on the table towards me. I grabbed it before it fell off the edge.

"Get some ice cream from the freezer", I instructed him, "should be a mini pot or two there. I'll get the spoons."

We got the ice cream and went upstairs, passing Renée and Charlie's room as we went. I stopped as I saw her. She was sat in the middle of her bed, clutching something.

"Renée?" I knocked on the door twice after gesturing Jacob to go ahead to my room.

"Hey Bells. You all right?" she stuffed the piece of paper under her pillow and looked up at me with a big fake smile. I narrowed my eyes at her suspiciously.

"Fine. Jacob's over. We're working on some…homework stuff in my room", I explained to her, "how was work today? You're home early."

"Um, yeah. I got a headache", she said, shaking her head and taking in a deep breath, "decided to take it easy, you know. Tell Jacob I said hello."

"Sure."

"Oh, there's some of my home made fruit smoothie downstairs", Renée said, lighting up as she did, "why don't you and Jacob try some?"

"We've got coke", I said lifting up the can in my hand.

"I used kiwi and passion fruit", was Renée's argument. I rolled my eyes, sighing heavily. Renée was always someone daring to try new things. She was the exact opposite of Charlie's quiet self and that's why they were prefect for eachother.

"Yeah, alright then", I mumbled, backing out of her room, "we'll try it."

I ran downstairs and filled up two glassfuls of some pink coloured liquid substances, pondering what Renée had had in her hand. She looked to be frowning when she was reading it earlier. I hoped it wasn't bad news.

I skipped back up the stairs and into my room as quickly as I could.

"Here, Jake. I've got us some of Renée's _oh_ –"

My foot caught on the purple slipper and the glasses in my hand went flying to the right. I stumbled forwards, falling straight onto Jacob.

The smoothie splattered across Jacob's torso, drenching his shirt and me as I landed right onto him.

"Oh shit", I mumbled, pulling myself back immediately, "Jake! I am _so_ sorry…"

"It's ok", Jacob laughed, steadying me. He looked at his wet, fruity shirt and arms covered in gunk, "I'm used to it, Bella. Oh…my T-shirt looks nice. I like it, a whole new look for me!"

"Oh shut up! Christ, I can't believe myself", I sighed, at my own stupidity. I grabbed a couple of towels from the bathroom and gave it to Jacob. He wiped his arms and neck.

"Take off the shirt", I commanded him. He raised an eyebrow at me.

"Really? That desperate to see me topless, huh?" Jacob teased, smirking. I rolled my eyes at him.

"Get it off!" I snapped, wiping my sticking arms. Jacob laughed once more before pulling off his shirt in one swift movement. What happened next, of course, I didn't anticipate.

My eyes locked on his chest, his dark golden skin colour was beautiful. His stomach and abs were perfectly toned. I had known Jacob for many years but had never really _looked_ at him.

"Hey, do you work out?" I blurted out, admiring his six-pack. The muscles on his arms looked defined and hard as stone.

Jacob looked at me sternly before answering.

"No. I swim, sometimes. Why do you ask?"

I forced myself to look him in the eye. Then looked away at the blush at covered my cheeks.

"No reason", I muttered, placing the shirt on my bedside table and hurrying out to get him one of Charlie's.

--

**Edward's POV.**

I had spent the whole day in the forest. As soon as Rosalie had put a name to the mysterious girl whose mind was forbidden to me, I ran like the coward that I was.

Rosalie worked at the school and _knew_ this girl. She was just another normal person in the small town of Forks. She was nothing special.

Then why did my thoughts evolve around _her_? It was true, my whole day had gone by and all I thought of was her. It was of how uniquely beautiful she looked. No other human had ever given me any reason to look at them twice before.

I had never been _physically _attracted to a human before. Why should I? I wasn't human. I was a vampire; it was only logical that my partner, my _mate_ should be a vampire too. Then why did this girl feel so right and so wrong at the same time?

She had touched me. A human hadn't touched me for so many years that it didn't matter anymore. She wasn't scared. She looked more curious than anything in the world. She looked intrigued, like I was.

I stood up, in the middle of the dark forest floor. Isabella Swan, Rosalie had said. Was that her? Was that what she was called? Isabella. It sounded like the last name she would be called. Although, I couldn't think of a name that would suit her. She didn't look a Jessica. She didn't look like a Jane. She looked like a name that was unique and beautiful and special.

Before I knew what I was doing, my feet were already pounding into the ground in full speed. I knew exactly where I was heading and I didn't stop myself.

I literally _couldn't_ stop myself. My curiosity and craving was guiding straight back to the girl's room. I didn't have an excuse to go there this time but I didn't really want one. All I wanted was to see her. To maybe just see what she was doing.

It was nearly three o'clock in the morning so I doubted that she'd be doing anything much than sleeping. Although, the last two times had visited the girl she was wide-awake and fully alert. What did she do in the middle of the night?

My thoughts wondered to imagine her sleeping form. An image of her perfect body curled up around some thin sheets popped up in my head. Her chest would be rising up and down slowly as she breathed in and out evenly. Maybe she'd smile in her sleep. She'd smile faintly, her full pink lips would look so soft and warm and inviting…

I gripped the side of the wall, scaling my way upwards toward the direction that my instincts led me to. Two people inhaling. One exhaling. Two dreams being dreamt. One mind blocked.

The window was wide open. I landed in the girl's room with a soft thud. It was then that I realised that she was wide-awake and was looking at me in a shocked manner.

My predictions of her were wrong. It might've been three o'clock in the morning but she wasn't asleep. She was _far_ from asleep. I watched as the girl's neck and face flushed with pulsating blood.

She smiled. "You're here."


	5. Chapter Five

Chapter five. Dominance.

**Edward's POV.**

_I watched as the girl's neck and face flushed with pulsating blood._

_She smiled. "You're here."_

I didn't say anything. I held my breath instead, fighting with the monster that was raging in my head. My mouth had watered with venom and my muscles were all tensed, ready for me to lunge at my prey.

My beautiful, intriguing prey.

She sat in the middle of her bed; her sheets were thrown around her. Her legs were crossed and the small shorts that she wore hitched up slightly and I could see all the way up her thigh.

Her chest was covered in another thin piece of material. A tiny white vest top that showed me her long pale slender arms, a little stretch of her smooth flat creamy stomach. Her breathing was almost a pant, except it wasn't because of me. No, she was long awake and alert before I came here.

She looked lost in thought, as if she was figuring something hard out. Then her face lit up as she smiled nervously at me. I couldn't detect any fear coming from her, nothing but pure anxiousness by her way her eyes shifted slightly edgily.

"Did my parents send you?" the girl asked. She sat very still on her bed. I straightened out my position, standing up straight and regarding her.

Her query puzzled me.

What did her question mean? No parent would send a blood-sucking monster to their daughter's room in the middle of the night. Besides, her parents were asleep in the other room in this house, weren't they?

I didn't reply her question; instead I took a step further into the room. I kept a bubble of space around her bed. However much I wanted to, I couldn't get close.

When I released my breath, however, I wasn't ready for the scent that hit me.

Her scent was now amazingly strong, a burst and refreshing scent of freesia filled my nostrils. A wave of strawberries and other light fruits waffled around in the room. I turned to face her.

"I…I thought you said you weren't going to come", she whispered very lightly. The back of my throat burned with the wonderfully inviting smell of her blood. It boiled under her flushing skin, calling out to me.

I distracted myself by focusing on this human's beauty. I could almost say that it _wasn't_ human. Just the way that her body was so slender and beautifully formed, the way her curves were just perfectly curvy. The softness of her skin made me want to reach out and stroke her body from top to bottom.

"I wasn't", I told her, meeting her curious gaze. My body was raging for dominance, fighting. One side of me wanted to relieve the urge…the desperate need, my nature was to drink blood. And _her_ blood looked so satisfying to me right now. But another side was fighting against it. Against _me_. I was coming up with reason after reason for why I shouldn't bite her.

I don't drink human blood anymore. I would probably kill her by the way I was hungered. It was so wrong. And the most important reason: I was ashamed of how she would react about me if she _did_ survive.

"And yet, here you are", the girl pointed out, "Did you…were you forced to come here? Do you not want to be here?"

Forced? What was this girl on about? Why would I be forced to be here? And surely I'd be the world's biggest fool _not_ to be in the presence of this beauty.

"I was not forced", I explained to her. A light smile played on her lips.

"But you're real, right?" she asked. The same question that she had asked before came again. She leaned forward eagerly, waiting for my answer.

"Yes, I am real as are you."

"I didn't know angels existed", the girl breathed out. Her heart was taking off, racing at sudden speeds. A sudden glimmer of excitement was shown in her eyes. "You're here from my parents because I have the nightmares, am I right? I'm right, aren't I?"

The nightmares…

This explained her being awake at such an hour. She couldn't sleep soundly, the poor thing. I knew humans were haunted by those vivid images they named nightmares. Some would be light, others could turn people crazy.

But one thing she was wrong about was me. I was not sent by her parents. I still didn't understand that bit. How could I be _sent_? Was she expecting a vampire to waltz into her room? Did her parents promise her that for her birthday or something?

But no. She didn't know what I was. She wouldn't even imagine such things. Instead, she thought I was an angel. I nearly scoffed at the idea. The most dangerous thing that roams the earth has been named…an angel. How ironic.

"What's your name?" I asked her, just for reassurance. I wanted to stir the conversation away from the angel topic.

The girl giggled. "Don't you know? Some angel you are…"

Once again, her words were confusing. If it weren't for Rosalie, of course I wouldn't know. Why would she think I would know her name?

"Isabella…Swan", I stated to her. She smiled as a light flush of blood flooded her cheeks and neck. I restricted myself from digging my teeth into her skin. Self control. I needed self-control.

"You're not Gabriel, are you? There are more, right?" she asked, completely seriously. I could've laughed allowed but I was afraid that it would confuse her, or scare her.

"Edward", I corrected her. Her smile widened as if she wasn't expecting that answer. Well, she probably wasn't expecting an angel to be called Edward anyway. I took a step towards her bed. Her heart was racing wildly, thrashing in the little space that it had.

"Nice to meet you, Edward", the girl said with a light smile, "I prefer Bella by the way, not Isabella. Too long."

"Bella", I amended. I liked the way her name sounded on my tongue. Bella meant beautiful, which was perfectly suited for her. Isabella was too long, she was right.

The girl yawned sleepily, placing a hand over her mouth. Her breath reached me; she had just recently brushed her teeth. I took another step closer to her, until my knees were touching the end of her bed. She looked up at me, just staring this time. Not asking questions as before.

"Tell me about your nightmares", I asked her. She frowned for a while, playing with her bottom lip to buy time. But I stood there, patient and still as ever. I could see how innocent this girl really was. I wanted to know everything about her. I wanted to stay right in this spot and ask her question after question to find out all the details of her life. I wanted to know every meaning of every word that she spoke.

She looked down when she responded.

"Its about my parents dying", she whispered in a sad tone. And I was stunned. The world had stopped spinning, frozen immediately. The air and winds had stopped blowing, stopped moving. The sea's waves had stop bobbing up and down, stopped crashing against the rocks.

And for me, it was like looking into the core of the sun. Seeing the burning, the heat, and the amazing colours sprouting up aflame. The girl, Bella, sat up straighter and took in a deep breath. She yawned once more, slapping her hand on her mouth to stifle it.

"I think it's best if you go to sleep", I told her gently. Humans needed around seven hours of sleep, anyway. It was odd to me how _this_ particular human stayed up at certain hours.

"Are you going?" the girl asked, a frown appearing on her face. I studied her expression. So innocent. Needing of help. There she was, a fragile little human, beautiful and absolutely tempting but looking so breakable. She bit her bottom lip, waiting for my answer. I was absolutely mesmerised by the pink full curve of her lips. And I suddenly had the urge to…

"It's very late. You shouldn't be awake", I explained to her, "try not to get nightmares this time, alright?"

She rolled her eyes at me.

What a stupid thing to say! Try not to get nightmares? It wasn't as if she _wanted_ to dream of the deaths of her parents. It wasn't as if she would _like_ to see the people she loved get snatched away from her.

But that's what she meant. When she had asked if her parents had sent me to her. The poor girl. Thinking that heaven existed and I was from it. And that her parents loved her so, saw her troubles with sleeping and sent me to help her get better…

"I'll help you sleep", I said. The girl looked up at me, a slow blush appearing on her cheeks.

"Help me?"

"I…it's what I'm here for, isn't it?" I said, trying to sound indifferent. I saw an opportunity and grabbed it. This human intrigued me. Confused me, amazed me, mesmerized me. In all my life as a vampire I had understood every human that I came across. They were there. Just cattle in the field that I roamed. But this one was different. How beautiful she was. How curious. How fearless.

She was everything I didn't expect.

"Edward", she said softly, the blood creeping under her skin. I ignored the raging monster, the urge to bite. I focused on her. My throat burnt as I inhaled but I couldn't bite her. I fought with myself, giving reasons on why it was right _not_ to bite her.

I hadn't bitten a human for decades. It would be wrong to start now. It would be even worst if it were _this_ human.

"Edward", Bella repeated again, flushing bright red this time.

"Yes?" the way she said my name startled it. It was like she was cooing it.

"Um…aren't you going to help me sleep now?" she asked, peering up at me under her long lashes.

"Oh…yes. Of course", I muttered, moving around the bed. Bella watched me walk uncomfortably. What was I supposed to do now? I had no idea how to _help_ someone to sleep. I had only just suggested it so that it would give me an excuse to be here. With her. "So…lie down. And…sleep."

"I probably won't have a nightmare again tonight", Bella whispered as she lay back. Her vest rid up and a soft piece of skin was exposed on her stomach. I found myself wanting to reach out and stroke it. I resisted the urge. I could feel the physical attraction that I felt of her begin to seep out.

"So how do you fall asleep fast?" I asked her. She turned so that she was on her side. I stood a meter from the side of the bed. Bella watched the distance between us before she met my gaze.

"Aren't you supposed to know that?" she asked in a teasing manner, "I mean, you're the angel here. Surely you should be the expert on everything about me."

"I…er…" I trailed off not knowing what to say. I was no angel. I knew nothing about humans and up to now, I didn't want to know. The girl smiled at me gently.

"I normally just lay down on my back until sleep finds me", she told me shrugging, "I've never really just hit the pillow and fall asleep. It usually takes over twenty minutes to loose myself in sleep."

I didn't say anything, watching how the girl – _Bella_ – was nibbling on her bottom lip gently. I watched her twirl a loose strand of that beautiful brown hair around her forefinger. Minutes past and she twisted about uncomfortably under my boring gaze.

"Are you going to stand a mile apart from me all night?" she asked, a slow smile playing on the corner of her lips. I stepped forwards hesitantly, testing myself. There was still a part of me that was planning on lunging at her and sinking my teeth into her neck. But the other part of me, the now dominant part, wanted to hold this beautiful girl in my arms and inhale her throat-burning scent as my lips would run over her soft, warm skin…

Holding my breath and pressing my lips into a straight line, I leaned over gently and the very tips of my fingers brushed from the temple of Bella's head and over her blushing cheek.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter six. Anger and Jealous.

_**Bella's POV.**_

His fingers touched my skin and suddenly something ignited inside of me. Like fireworks exploding in my stomach, fires burning brightly through my veins. It was the most amazing feeling I had ever felt. Like I was flying, soaring and elevated above all.

His fingers were smooth and cold against my warm skin. Our eyes were locked and the electricity that ran through my body flowed through him too. My Angel looked hesitant, almost scared of what he was doing.

And I understood everything now. Angels _did_ exist. Heaven _was_ real. That's where my parents were. And they loved me and cared for me so much, as I did towards them. This was why an angel was standing in front of me. Because somehow, he had been sent to look after me.

My hand reached up and clasped over his on my cheek. His hand froze. I noticed how icicle cold his hand was but I didn't flinch or move away. The electrical, buzzing feeling was tingling through the both of us still. The sensation was amazing. I could only guess that he was doing that with some sort of 'Heavenly Power'.

I snorted at the thought and I couldn't believe that I actually thought that. But it was true. Angels existed. I wasn't crazy. I didn't make him up.

Edward was real.

I had woken up in the middle of the night, disappointed that my nightmares continued to haunt me. My mind was still on the stranger who said he wouldn't return. But he did. My angel came to me. He was named Edward.

The beauty of his face, his perfect features made me smile and made my heart flutter. At first, I thought that he was here to get another blue box from underneath my floorboards, but not once did he loose focus from staring at me. And that's how I figured it all out.

He was hesitant and seemed fairly nervous about being in my presence. That was exactly how I felt about him. He was a precious being. So beautiful. So unique. Nothing that I could ever dream of. I had so many questions that I intended on asking him. Edward, my angel.

My eyes drooped slightly as I continued to look into his soft green eyes. They were a colour of fresh spring leaves. The colour of a large warm watered ocean. Somewhere I could close my eyes and lose consciousness…

_**Edward's POV.**_

My hand was trapped between the girl's head and the pillow underneath. Her warm short breaths were hitting my wrists. Her eyes were closed gently. Her hair was sprayed beautifully on the pillow. Her lips were parted gently, pink and curved. I watched, amazed.

Suddenly, she turned, freeing my hand. She twisting to her other side and snuggled deeper into the bed with the tangled sheets. My hand now felt empty. I continued to watch her sleep, as she breathed in short breaths.

"Beautiful", I heard myself whisper. And I couldn't deny it. If not my vampire side, then the male part of me found this girl beautiful. So very attractive. The perfect essence of femininity.

I wandered around her room, running my fingers over her desk. Her room was clustered and scattered with any normal female teenage things. Her school books layed around, pages of half completed homework along side pens and a professional looking calculator. A laptop covered with an old Jane Eyre book caught my attention. Because a foreign object was next to it.

I moved soundlessly towards the table on the side of the bed. A dark green T-shirt was there. I picked it up, puzzled. It was a completely different scent than Bella's. It was a man's shirt.

The scent was musty, covered with men's cologne and a touch of earthy aroma. I could also detect a tinge of sweat.

This was definitely _not_ Bella's shirt.

I dropped it, angered to the bone. A _man_ had been in her room. And had taken off his shirt…

The jealousy that I felt was inexcusable, I know, but I couldn't restrain myself. Bella was a grown teenager, almost a woman herself. It was obvious that a beautiful and attractive girl like herself would have boyfriends. It was obvious that they'd come home with her, come to her room…

I shook my head to clear away the thoughts and images that I didn't want. Maybe it was her father's shirt. No, her father was dead. Then, it belonged to her adoptive father. He was sleeping in a couple of rooms down. I could hear his thoughts and dream.

The shirt could belong to him. It didn't necessary have to mean that Bella had had a boy over and he took off his shirt for her.

I stalked over back to Bella's bed. She slept soundly, gently and innocently. The sight was beautiful. It calmed the anger that I had felt. Yet, I didn't know _why_ felt so anger, so jealous. Surely, I couldn't be feeling _too_ overprotective over this girl, could I?

Well, it seemed that I could. After all, she did consider me as her angel of some sort. My eyes flickered to the shirt on the table.

In a swift movement, I grabbed it considering tearing it to tiny pieces, throwing it out of the window. But I didn't. I threw it to the side as my eyes were led back to Bella's sleeping form.

I would convince Bella to not go out with boys who smelt like earth. Besides, I was her guardian angel; I had to guide her to do the right things.

--

**_Bella's POV._**

My alarm clock rang, making me jump up with a little yelp. I groaned, reaching my hand from under the sheets and tapping blindly on the table. My fingers touched the clock and I pressed off the button. The noise stopped. I sat up lazily, yawning my heart out and opening my eyes.

He was there, with a light smirk on his face, sat on my desk swivel chair. His arms were crossed and he wore an amused expression.

"You're here", I breathed out, surprised. Edward stood up, smiling a crooked grin. I noticed that he had changed his clothes. He was now wearing black baggy pants and a white tight shirt. The shirt showed off his toned muscles perfectly. I could feel myself drooling.

"It's Friday today. You ought to get up and ready for school, am I correct?" he asked, perfectly formally. I nodded like a puppet.

"Were you planning on moving at all?" he grinned widely when I hadn't moved. I blinked.

"Yeah…" I muttered, stumbling out of bed. I gathered some clothes and headed towards my door, then halted.

"I'll wait here for you", Edward said politely. I nodded and ran out of the room. The temperature was rising too much.

The excitement that I felt was just indescribable. It was morning and he was here. This had never happened before. I couldn't be hallucinating. Yesterday did happen. He was there and so was I. I fell asleep with him in the room. My night was dreamless and I loved it. There were no nightmares.

I could finally tell Jacob now. And he had to believe me. Edward was real. I took a quick shower and brushed my teeth, rushing as I did so. I couldn't keep an angel waiting.

As I got dressed, I wondered if Edward was going to come to school with me today. Or maybe I was the only one who could see him, since he was _my_ angel. I smiled. I liked the thought of that. _My_ angel.

"Morning, honey", Renée said brightly as I stepped out of the bathroom. I smiled at her.

"Hey, Renée. Charlie gone already?" I asked her. She nodded. She was dressed already.

"We've got a dinner tonight at Officer Baxter's house, will you be ok alone?" she asked concernedly. I nodded.

"I'll be fine", I told her.

"Good, I better head out now, Bella", said Renée, "have a good day, honey. Bye."

"Bye Renée."

As soon as she disappeared down the stairs, I skipped back to my bedroom.

To find it empty.

I looked around frantically, as disappointment was suddenly sinking in. my throat was dry and a horrible feeling stirred in my stomach as I noticed that my window was wide open.

No! Why did he leave?

He said he would wait.

I ran towards the window with my eyes watering.

"Edward!" I hissed out loud.

"Yes?" a perfectly smooth voice said. I yelped, turning to the left to see Edward hanging on perfectly to the side of my house. My eyes widened as I stared at him.

"I…I…what are you doing?" I demanded him in shocked.

"Your adoptive mother is about to return", he told me, "and I don't –"

"Bella, do you…what are you doing?" I turned around to see Renée looking at me with a bemused expression.

"Well…I…"

"Close that window, honey it's windy", she said, entering my room and sighing, "listen, Bella. There's something I've got to tell you. It's pretty important and I just remembered it this morning."

"What is it?" I asked her, curiously. The sombre, serious look on Renée's face told me that she wasn't joking. Normally she'd have a happy, excited expression on.

"Oh no, no, no!" she said suddenly, "no honey, no it's nothing bad. I'm sorry; look it's nothing bad. It's good news, good news Bella. Well…sort of good news."

"Renée, what is it?" I asked her, half laughing.

"Do you remember your uncle Kevin?" she asked me. Uncle Kevin…uncle Kevin…

"My mother's brother?" I confirmed. She nodded. When my parents had died I had gone to the custody of my uncle Kevin. But at the time, he didn't want me. Uncle Kevin looked a lot like my mother but short black hair and brown eyes. He was into drugged and unfortunately was an alcoholic. He died a couple of days before my seventeenth birthday. So according to the will when he didn't want, the custody went to Charlie and Renée.

"Well, it turns out that he left an amazing sum of money in your name", Renée explained, "I only got the letter yesterday and I was sorting out the papers to transfer the money to your bank account."

"That's what you were being so secretive about", I narrowed my eyes at her. She grinned; shrugging then glanced at her watch.

"Oops! I better go", Renée said hurriedly, "we'll talk about it more later, bye sweetie!"

And skipped out of my room. I watched her this time as she ran down the stairs and straight for the door. I waited until the purr of her car engine had started up and died away at the end of the road.

I turned back to my room.

"Edward?" I called out timidly. He skipped into my room with a quite thud, not a hair out of place.

"I apologise for not letting you know that I needed to hide", he said quietly, "but I realised your mother – _adoptive_ mother's intention to return to your room and had to hide."

"So no ones can know you're my…angel?" I asked, feeling frustrated. How was I going to tell Jacob now?

A smooth smile broke across Edward's face. "It isn't very wise to go around telling people you have a guardian angel, Bella. I think it's best if you keep me a secret."

"Ok, I'll keep you…a secret", I muttered.

"Oh and Isabella?" Edward said in an odd tone. My head snapped up and I drew in a shaky breath. He had moved closer to me. I was now looking up at Edward's beautifully shaped face. There were about a foot in-between us.

"Yes?" I breathed out.

"As your…angel, I think it's wise to advise you not to be in a relationship right now", Edward said in a knowing tone. My eyebrows furrowed.

"I'm…I'm not in a relationship", I stuttered, dazzled by his beautiful eyes.

He arched his let eyebrow.

"Really?" Edward asked suspiciously. I nodded furiously.

"And what's that?" he asked sharply, pointing to a familiar puddle of material. I walked over to my table and retrieved the green shirt Edward had pointed to. _Jacob_.

"Oh…this is Jake's shirt", I mumbled quietly, as my cheeks flushed red uncontrollably.


	7. Chapter Seven

_**Chapter seven: The touch**_

**Bella's POV**

"Oh...this is Jake's shirt", I mumbled quietly, as my cheeks flushed red uncontrollably. Edward arched an eyebrow at me.

"And who is this..._Jake_ person?" he asked, saying the name like it was a dirty word. I rolled my eyes.

"My best friend", I explained, "He came over yesterday and I accidently spilt some juice on him so I told him to take off the shirt."

"You told him to take off the shirt?" Edward asked, looking outrages. I blinked at him.

"Yeah...it was wet", I said defensively. He made me feel like I had stripped from Jacob. "So...I got him a new shirt from Charlie. What's the problem?"

Edward recomposed his face into a blank mask as he eyed the shirt on the table. I grabbed it quickly.

"Well...you ought to go to school now", he said after a while. I stared at him, trying to figure out what exactly had just happened. Did he tell me off? I just got a scolding from an _angel_?

Nice.

"Aren't you coming with me?" I asked him timidly.

I really wanted Edward to be with me today. It seemed as if I couldn't help it when he was away. That's when all the doubts would creep in. I didn't want to be during the middle of the day then realise that this had all been a dream or just my imagination. I wanted Edward to be real and whenever I was near him, I knew that he was.

"No...I don't think that's wise", said Edward curtly. He looked at my clock pointedly. "You better get on, Bella. As your angel... I don't think I should be holding you up when you need to go learn."

"What exactly are you here for then?" I asked him sceptically. I mean, I knew that he was here to stop me having bad dreams but was that it? Is that why he was here only during the night?

But then I was contradicting myself because it was as clear day as dark and rainy as Forks was, and yet here he was. I presumed Edward was some sort of protector. Wasn't that what guardian angels were? I mean, he couldn't protect me if we were apart.

Edward smirked secretly and I could see a disguised twinkle in his soft green eyes.

"I'm here to help you on many levels Bella", he explained gently, "but mostly because you fascinate me. I mean, well you fascinate everyone. You're special."

And that was probably the most clichéd moment of my life. Yet it felt like the best moment of my life. Many people had told me I was special, but I never believed them. Why would I? There was noting extra ordinary and brilliant about me. But when Edward had said it, I had to believe him. I mean after all he was my angel. _My_ _angel_.

"I...I better get to school", I stammered, backing away towards the door. I blinked, trying to steady myself as I turned around.

"Learn something", Edward called out in an amused voive as I walked out. I felt oddly empty, knowing he couldn't be there with me. I turned back around and skipped into my room. Edward was already at the window.

"Wait! Edward", I called out as he coiled to spring out. "w-where are you going?"

"I'm going....where did you expect me to go?" he asked, turning back around with a puzzled look on his face.

"Well...I don't know...I thought...I thought you were staying with me", I said in a small voice.

Or maybe hide in my bedroom until I get home. Actually, I was leaning towards the latter. If he left then I wouldn't be sure if he'd come back to me. After all, when I was nine years old he had sprung out of my window and hadn't returned for eight years.

"I just told you that I couldn't accompany you to school Bella", Edward said softly, taking a step towards me.

"Well...can't you turn invisible or something?" I asked desperately, "I don't know...don't guardian angels turn tiny and stand on people's shoulders whispering in the person's ear to do stuff?"

Edward chuckled, shaking his head whilst I huffed.

"I cannot turn invisible nor stand on your small shoulders", he said slowly taking another step, half laughing.

"Some Angel ! No powers", I scoffed, "So are you just normal person with super beauty then?"

I blushed as I realised what I had just said. He smiled gently.

"I wish", Edward muttered quietly, "I do have powers Bella...but it doesn't work on you however."

"It doesn't work on me?" I repeated, quirking an eyebrow.

"No....my most precious gift and its no use to me", he shrugged, walking closer still. We were both standing by the doorway now, my back to it. Edward looked down at me as a lock of stray hair fell on his forehead.

"Well, what is it?" I asked him curiously.

Edward hesitated then sighed heavily in resigned way. "Mind reading."

"Mind reading?" I repeated, incredulous, "You can read minds? Holy sh –"

"It isn't wise for a lady to curse", Edward cut in, rolling his eyes in an amused way, "You better listen to me Bella, I know what's best for you."

"Wait, don't change the subject. Why can't you read my mind?" I demanded him, practically bouncing on the spot.

"I'm not sure", Edward answered, shrugging.

I was awed. I couldn't believe it. Yet there was a massive part of me that was immensely glad that he couldn't read my mind. I had, after all, been thinking unforgiveable thoughts of his body. I felt the colour paint my cheeks as I heated up. _Must not think about Edward's body when he's standing les than a foot away from you._

"Well, I...what...is there something wrong with me?" I asked, sighing.

"I just told you that I can't read minds and you think that there's something wrong with _you_?" Edward chuckled. I resisted the urge to brush the hair off his forehead.

"I'm glad I amuse you so much", I muttered quietly.

"Not only that Bella," whispered Edward closing, closing the space between us, "Oh you do much more than that. You enthral me, and captivate, holding my interest in so many ways. I don't get surprised and appealed in many things Bella, you're probably the only one."

"And why do I enthral you so much?" I asked him, confused.

He smiled and lifted his hand up softly. The back of it grazed the skin on my jaw line as he traced it delicately. My whole body flushed with heat and embarrassment. I felt Edward stiffen slightly, looking as if he was holding his breath. I smiled at him, smoothing my cheek against his cold yet smooth hand.

"That's what I'm here to figure out", Edward murmured. Our eyes locked and brown met with beautiful emerald green. And I felt myself get lost in some sort of hypnotic lock that was happening between us.

And then like the clumsy idiot I was, I was falling. Now I had fallen many times before. I tripped over my two left feet enough times to give me marks and grazes and cuts all over my elbows and knees but this was like a different kind of falling. When his cold yet smooth hand had crushed over my skin I felt like I was flying. Not falling but flying. Whooshing through something that I didn't know what. And it was brilliant. I loved it.

I could feel Edward's cool strong arms around me, holding me close to him as my eyes closed of their own accordance. I could hear his panicked voice. He was shaking me slightly, trying to get me back. But I didn't want to go back. I was falling, flying and floating. With my angel holding me tight.

"Bella! Bella!"

**Edward's POV**

I didn't know what had happened. I had stepped close to her, too close. I was lost in those pools of pure beautiful muddy coloured eyes. Her skin was so soft and so warm. So absolutely beautiful that I couldn't help but loose myself completely. She was amazing. She was so different, so special.

I could feel the venom in my mouth but I pushed it away. I pushed it away because I couldn't think about that now. Her blush was covering her cheek, her neck. A beautiful pink colour. Turning into the taunting colour of blood red. Bella closed her eyes and exhaled out loud.

And collapsed in my arms.

I snapped out of the little magnetic pull that was drawing me close to her. Her eyes were tight closed and her body was limp. I panicked.

"Bella? Bella, are you alright?"

This was no time for me to be the angel that I was faking. I was planning on pretending to be her angel, fulfilling what she wanted at the same time as studying her. But now I was truly concerned. I couldn't help but be protective of this girl.

What had happened? Did she faint? Wasn't she breathing? Was it me?

"Bella! Bella!"

I cradled her into my arms, holding her close I and mounted her gently on the bed. She looked fine a second ago. She was smiling faintly up at me. I was feeling content. I had forgotten everything. As soon as I had touched her, it was like something tensed in the atmosphere. The demons of hell were hissing because a monster like myself had gotten the chance to touch an innocent creature like Bella. A monster like myself was slowly falling for her.

"Edward?"

The slightest whisper. The smallest voice. The little syllables.

"Are you ok?" I asked her. Her pulse was fine, a little faster than normal but fine nevertheless. Bella opened her eyes and sat up. She blinked, looking around.

"Are you alright? Would you like some water?" My arms were still around her shoulders, holding her close. I was ignoring the venom in my mouth; I was ignoring the urge to kill. I had to protect her. I had to make sure she was safe.

"Yeah...no, I'm fine", Bella stuttered, shaking her head. A fresh scent of her beautiful hair filled my nostrils. I tensed, stopping the air flow to my lungs immediately. Bella noticed.

"Edward? Are you alright?" she asked, turning to me. I closed my eyes to concentrate. The monster inside of me roared_. BITE HER! GET IT OVER WITH!_

I pulled myself away, snatching myself away from Bella and went to stand by the window. The fresh air of the trees and polluted atmosphere filled my lungs. I turned around to see Bella watching me warily.

"Go to school", I told her in a strained voice, "You're going to be late."

"But I don't –"

"Go", I snapped at her, through gritted teeth. If she was around for any second longer, I wouldn't be able to control myself. "Now Bella! I'm your guardian angel, trust me. Go...please Bella..."

"Are you going to stay?" Bella whispered, grabbing her bag and slowly backing away towards the door. Good girl.

"I'll be here before you fall asleep", I told her. And she turned and left.

As soon as she did so, I wasted no time in springing out of the window and running for the cover of the trees. My scent was now mixed with the beautiful scent of Bella Swan. She was going to be the death of me.

--

_Oh I can hear him now, he's here. Thank goodness._ I was greeted by Esme kind thoughts I as ran towards the house. No doubt I'd be stampeded with questions of my whereabouts. I just really hoped that Rosalie wasn't here today. She had work so hopefully she'd be gone. Her cold, nosy thoughts were what I needed.

I blocked my family's thoughts, hoping to give myself a piece of mind and to give them some privacy as I got to the house. Esme opened the door, smiling at me.

"Edward", she greeted me, opening her arms out for a hug. The human gesture never really got to me, but I did it nevertheless for Esme. Inconspicuously, she sniffed my clothes and stiffened.

_It's the same scent as last time Edward. Who is she? Is it the girl Rosalie was talking about?_ A curious expression, as well as happiness landed on Esme's face. She smiled at me gently, hoping I would spill.

"What is her name?" Esme asked me, closing the door as I entered. I grimaced as I noticed Alice and Jasper on the loveseat.

The little pixie turned to smile at me.

"Good morning dear brother", Alice smiled. She was singing a French song in her head, blocking her thoughts. Jasper sniffed and smirked.

_Did Eddie-boy get lucky last night as well?_ I sighed as I realised that Emmett was in the house.

"Don't you have a job or something?" I muttered, knowing fully well that he would hear.

"Sick leave", he laughed. It was a good idea for Emmett or Rosalie to take a couple of days off work during the year or people would get suspicious. They had to get sick, humans did.

I heard his soft thuds as he flitted down from the third floor.

_I love her Edward! She's amazing! When can I meet her?_ Alice's shriek was annoying with her thoughts and her voice. I shook my head at her.

"You haven't decided yet?" she voiced her thoughts.

"Haven't decided what?" Jasper asked impatiently. No one liked the silent conversations between Alice and I.

"Nothing", I said, turning to go upstairs.

"When we're meeting...Belle? Bella? Isabella? Is that her name?" Alice asked out loud. She was singing _Frere Jacque _in her head. I stiffened when I heard her name.

"Wait? Is this the girl Rosie was talking about?" Emmett boomed, descending the stairs. I did not like the amount of attention my family were now giving me.

_I know Isabella Swan from school_. Emmett told me through his thoughts. A picture of Bella flashed in his head. A little growl escaped my lips. He shouldn't be thinking about her. _She was mine_!

_Edward_, Jasper warned me through his thoughts. I felt a wave of reassurance and calm wash over me.

"Edward? Who is she?" Esme asked out loud.

"The love of his life", Alice answered. And then she unleashed all the thoughts, images and foreseen scenes that she had been hiding in her mind.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter eight. Truths of the future

_**Edward's POV.**_

**Recap:**

"**Edward? Who is she?" Esme asked out loud.**

"**The love of his life", Alice answered. And then she unleashed all the thoughts, images and foreseen scenes that she had been hiding in her mind. **

I stood next to the stairs as I was attacked with visions of Isabella Swan. I had stopped breathing altogether. Alice was smiling at me brightly, unleashing every single image that she had hiden from me before. My whole family was silent as they waited for me to see and possibly tell them what laid in my future. I watched Alice's mind, amazed.

_A window, an image of me skipping in what looked like Bella's room. She smiled, welcoming me in._

"_I'm glad you're here..." her voice was sweet, expectant. I walked over to her as she sat patiently on the bed. Our heads leaned closer and our lips brushed against each other. My hand cupped her face and caressed her cheek softly. She was so warm, so beautiful and so delicately fragile. All I wanted to do was –_

_**-Another vision-**_

"_Bella? Are you ok? You can open your eyes now", I whispered to her. She was on my back, gripping tightly to my shoulders. _

_The vision was now hazy and blurry but I could see that we were in some sort of forest, a meadow. Bella breathed out and descend off my back, I turned around and steadied her. She looked up at me, a little flustered, her cheeks pink._

"_That was faster than I initially expected", Bella squeaked. I chuckled, pulling her close to me. Her chest was mashed together. She stood on her tiptoes, flinging her arms around my neck._

"_My fast angel..." and we leaned closer once more –_

_**-A new vision-**_

_I pulled out the first blue box. Bella smiled at me, a slow shy smile. Her face heated up from the blush. She sat in her old sweats, in the middle of the bed with sheets entangled around her but she looked more beautiful than any other creature I had ever seen._

_Bella took the box and opened it easily. Inside, a surprise to my own eyes, were a pair of diamond earrings. Her trembling fingers reached in and she grasped onto one of them._

"_They're now yours", I told her –_

_**-A different vision-**_

_I was alone in the forest, my eyes scanning the place. It was daylight and helped my already enhanced senses. My ears were twitching with the sound of my prey. I coiled and sprung on the deer. _

_It was too slow, much too slow to realise what had ever happened before it met its death. My teeth sunk into the neck and I lapped up the red juice. The liquid didn't satisfy my hunger; the burn in my throat like I wished it to, but it was enough for now. I let my mind wander and I sucked the animal dry and..._

"_Oh god!" _

_My head snapped up immediately towards the sound of the voice. _

_And there she was, Bella, clutching onto a tree as she watched me. The blood dripped from my mouth over my chin. My eyes widened. She stared at me in horror. I immediately held my breath. This was dangerous. Much too dangerous._

"_Edward! Oh...what are you...?" _

_She was panting now, terrified what she had seen. Me, as a monster. The monster I always was. The wind blew in her direction and carried her scent towards me. I could taste her in the air._

"_You're not an angel", she gasped out, shaking her head and backing away. She needed to go. She needed to get away. I couldn't control myself. I was already frenzied with the hunger for blood. Her blood._

"_Bella, I –"_

"_You're _NOT_ an angel", she screamed at me as she began to run –_

I pulled myself from Alice's mind as quickly as I could, afraid of what would now happen. Because I could just guess what would happen if Bella tripped. Just a little stumble, to graze her knees or hands and then I would smell her blood and then..

"I'm so sorry", Alice said quickly, "Edward, that last one just sneaked in. I didn't even see that one before. I didn't realise that –"

"It's alright Alice", I said through clenched teeth, "really. Don't worry about it."

"Dude, what did you see?" demanded Emmett impatiently. _So you're really involved with a human, huh._

"Edward, relax", said Jasper softly. And I did immediately, thanks to his powers. My fists unclenched. I fought the image of Bella looking scared of me out of my head. She had never looked scared of me. Most human normally shied away but she never did. She had always gotten closer.

"She doesn't know", said Alice in a small voice. I turned to glare at her. _Edward, she doesn't know you're a vampire. You can't lie to her Edward, you just can't._

"Doesn't know what?" asked Esme curiously.

_She thinks you're an angel_. Alice smiled at me sadly. _You have to tell her Edward. You don't lie to the ones you love_.

"I don't love her", I exploded out. Alice took a step back and jasper tensed.

"Calm down", hissed jasper, standing in front of Alice protectively. I blinked, stepping back slowly.

"I'm sorry", I said quietly, "I apologise Alice...I don't...I don't love her. She's just..."

"Edward, she's not just", Esme said softly. She placed an arm on my shoulder. "if she was just, you wouldn't be going back to her, would you?"

"She's human", I spat out bitterly, "but she different, that's why I go back."

_Why does she think you're an angel_? Alice looked at me in a puzzled way.

"She presumed and I didn't correct her", I explained quietly.

"What's so different about her?" Emmett asked. _Looks the same as any other human to me_. "I see her everyday; she looks same as any other chick. Plain, average, normal."

"There's nothing average about Bella", I whispered menacingly.

_Edward, tell her_. Alice looked at me pleadingly. Her eyes fixed on mine. I sighed, rolling my eyes.

"She's human, Alice. As soon as I tell her she'll just run away", I told her, shaking my head, "or expose us. Do you want that to happen?"

"She's different", said Alice gently, "you know she is. You've been considering telling her, haven't you?"

"Rosalie isn't going to be happy about it", Emmett said, catching onto the conversation, "she wouldn't want a measly human to know, Edward. Besides, the girl will probably go around spreading rumours. It's a small town."

"Edward, is she safe to trust?" asked Esme, looking at me with nothing but surprise and curiously.

"I don't know", I shrugged off the question. I shook my head. "I'll be upstairs."

And with that, I took off running upstairs into my room.

--

I couldn't imagine telling Bella that I wasn't her angel. I hadn't planned it. I didn't want to. She believed that I was something good, something innocent like an angel. Who was I to burst her bubble?

But she believed a lie. She believed that I was good, something good in her life. She believed a massive lie. I was corrupting her innocence by making her believe that I was there to help her.

I did want to be there for her. I had to be. I couldn't help resisting being away from bella. Not anymore. It this short amount of time, she had captivated me for as long as we both shall live.

I could hear Esme and Alice downstairs, busying themselves with artificial human work. It was all part of their act, pretending to be human. I was no worst than them when I acted to be a angel for Bella, wasn't I?

Alice couldn't accuse me of lying to her when she was lying to the whole town. Putting up this human facade was just as bad as my false pretence with Bella. In fact, hers was worst. What I was doing, I was doing for the sake of Bella. She seemed happy with believing that I was somehow sent from her parents. She seemed content to be around me. Though, that wasn't exactly a good thing. She shouldn't get too close to me...not like I was getting to her.

Attraction was another big thing between us. I couldn't deny the fact that I was attracted to bella. There was no reason not to be. She had blossomed so beautifully from an awkward skinny little girl to an amazing young woman.

As much as I wanted to protect her physically from any harm, I also felt overly protective of everything else. The simple thought of any other male being in her bedroom made my skin crawl. Somehow I just presumed that I was in the only male in her life, apparently not.

I did not know whether Bella returned my physical attractions. She never made a move to flirt act as most other females have. Although, with the other women I got to read their minds so I knew if my charms were working. With Bella, it was different. She seemed so relaxed around me. Too relaxed.

I snuck out of the house, blocking the thoughts of my family as I did. I needed to hunt if I was going to spend the night with her. I couldn't take any chances, especially not after what had happened this morning. No doubt, she'd be expecting a confrontation.

As I hunted, filling my body with the blood, my mind wondered back to what Alice had showed me. There were no dates to her visions so of course I had no idea when any of it would happen. My mind filled with the picture of Bella and I in the intimate scene. The way I had held her and kissed her. That was what was held in my future. Bella.

Surely that vision should give me hope. It meant that Bella was interested in me, at least possibly attracted to me as I was to her. It meant that we _did_ have a future. It meant that she would survive and I wouldn't slip up and give in to the monster inside of me.

It also meant that I had to keep lying to her. It meant that I had to break down my walls and let Bella into my dangerous life. A poor, fragile human. I was going to let her get involved with the world's most dangerous predator. This all meant that, in truth, I did love Bella Swan. Or I will, in the future.

_--_

When I got home, it was twilight. I would have to go to Bella soon. I couldn't help but smile at that thought. I strolled into the house and suddenly, the smile on my face disappeared.

My family was gathered in the dinning room. It had no purpose to us of course, apart from maybe serving as a conference room. My mood disintegrated as I read my family's thoughts. I blocked them all out as I strolled in their direction. Carlisle and Rosalie was home, I smelt their scent and their cars were present in the garage.

They were expecting me. Apparently, Jasper, Emmett, Esme and Alice had filled in Rosalie and Carlisle of the recent events. Apparently there was going to be a family meeting. Apparently it was going to decide mine and Bella's fate.

I clenched my teeth.

Carlisle and Esme sat together at the end of the table. Alice stood behind them with Jasper. Rosalie and Emmett stood on the left. I ignored the thoughts in her head. She was too judgemental.

_Stay this time_. Esme smiled at me sadly. She had no idea that I had already decided to do just that. Although I was used to walking and roam the earth, for now I would stay. For Bella, I would definitely stay. It wasn't a choice anymore.

_Son. The others have told us the situation_. Carlisle spoke through his thoughts. He acknowledged me with a genuine smile. _Alice has explained. And I am happy for you_.

"She stinks of him", Rosalie spat out bitterly. Her glare pierced through me. Her voice broke the silence in the room. I could feel Jasper working hard to keep the peace, especially since so much anger and bitterness was rolling off of Rosalie.

"What is the use of this?" I asked aloud to no one and everyone in particular.

Did my family really think they were going to discuss what was going to happen in my life? I think not. This was my personal infatuation, my personal affair that I was dealing with right now. It did not affect them, yet. As long as Bella believe that I was her guardian angel, it mattered not to my family.

"We want to know what the hell you're thinking", Rosalie spoke again, straight at me, "she's frickin' human, you selfish irresponsible fool!"

"That's enough", Carlisle said firmly. _Rosalie's just concerned, Edward_.

"This is none of your business", I told them, "I mean no disrespect in any way but Bella and I are in no way associated with you."

"Don't you live here?" Emmett joked, trying to lighten the mood. _Dude, Rosalie's fuming. Wrap this up as fast as you can, she's going to blow._

"If that is a problem, I will move out", I told them smoothly.

_Edward no. That's not necessary._ "We just want to know what your intentions are", said Esme quickly, "we're your family Edward. You're not just... playing around with this girl, are you?"

"No, he's in love with her", Alice piped up.

"What?" Rosalie scoffed._ Are you kidding me? Seriously Edward, thiis ridiculous. _Her eyes flickered between me and Alice. "You've fallen for a human! Isabella?"

"Its a nice name", said Esme softly._ Do we get to meet her yet?_

"This changes things", Carlisle sighed. _You obviously care for her, Edward. Does this mean you're staying in Forks. Esme will be pleased._

"She's human", snapped Rosalie. _What a jerk! Are you crazy? Moron! Jackass! Selfish pig!_ _We could get exposed, she'll blab it to everyone._

"He's not in love with her", Jasper said, speaking for the first time. _Calm down Edward, the tension is making me twitch_.

"Yes, he is", Alice insisted.

"But...she's _human_..."

"Isn't he the empathy in the room here Alice?" Emmett said, jabbing a thumb towards Jasper. Alice glared at Emmett while I rolled my eyes.

"I've seen it", Alice snapped. She turned to me. "You've seen it too Edward, don't deny it."

"Did you hear my denial?" I said to her. She smirked smugly.

"Right now he only lusts after her", Jasper explained, "he's protective, yet confused. But Edward is not fully in love with the girl."

"She's _human_", Rosalie exclaimed for the last time. "Can't anyone hear me? She's a little seventeen year girl in my English class. She's frail and weak and absolutely _human_!"

"Alice has told us that she doesn't know", Jasper said, ignoring Rosalie. "The girl doesn't know about vampires."

"The question is", Carlisle spoke, looking straight at me, "do you trust her enough to tell her?"

"Absolutely _not_", shrieked Rosalie bringing her hand down to smack the unused dinning table. This time she was really catching everyone's attention. Her eyes were livid, glaring venom straight at me.


	9. Chapter Nine

Chapter nine. Kissing An Angel

_**Bella's POV**_

"Do you believe in the supernatural?" I mused aloud. Jacob played with my fingers silently. HE did not answer. I suppose he was giving me the silent treatment because I had been acting weird.

"I already apologised", I mumbled, gripping his finger hard to get his attention.

We were sat in the library, it was lunchtime and neither of us felt hungry so we wandered around. Jacob sighed heavily. I immediately felt guilty for ignoring him all day. My thoughts were clouded, and of course I was thinking about _him_. Edward.

The way he looked at me this morning. At first with confusion when we were so close, so very close. Then with lust, pure adulterated lust. It was the intimacy of the situation, because we were the only ones there. In our own little world, just me and my angel.

And then it had an unhappy ending because he had snatched himself away from me. Suddenly, Edward was so far away. I felt so empty without him. He had practically begged me to go to school. I didn't understand what was going on.

First, he had stepped closer to me and then he ordered me to get as far away from him as possible with the unbelievable fury in his eyes.

"...only been your best friend forever. You don't have to tell me anything. It doesn't matter. I bet you're not even listening to me now", muttered Jacob under his breath. He stared at the ground, murmuring to himself.

"Sorry, what?"

With a look of frustration and a mostly hurt, Jacob pulled himself back and stood up. He glared at me for a couple of seconds.

"What?" I asked him again.

"Did you listen to _anything_ I had just said?" He spoke through gritted teeth.

"yeah...I was...yes, of course you said that we were best friends forever and..." I trailed off sheepishly. Jacob stared at me in confusion.

"Thanks", he said. And then walked away.

--

Of course, he shouldn't have thanked me. I didn't even understand what the '_thanks'_ was meant for but I knew it was obvious sarcasm. I stood up after a while, staring after my best friend as he vanished out of the library door.

I considered calling after him but I knew that would earn me nothing but a glare from the librarian.

I gathered my books, pilling them into my bag as quickly as I could and practically raced out of the way, the same way that Jake had gone through.

He shouldn't have walked away from me like that. I knew that I had been on mars, in my own thoughts all day but that didn't give him an excuse to over react. So what if I had a lot on my mind? He should be the understanding friend, not pissed off and annoyed.

I felt guilty as I skipped after him, knowing that maybe I had ignored him a little bit too much today.

"Jake!" I called out when I noticed him. He slouched against the wall near his locker, fiddling with his jacket zipper.

"What?" he said in a toneless, indifferent voice.

"Are you ok?" I asked him as I slowed down towards him. He shrugged, turning to look at me.

"Don't walk away from me like that, I get lonely", I said punching him arm. He grabbed my hand.

"And I get lonely when my best friend acts like I'm invisible", he shot back hotly. I sighed and wrapped my arms around his torso.

"I'm sorry", I said in a quiet voice.

"I understand if you're hiding something", Jacob carried on, "and I won't pressure you to speak. But why do you ignore me like that? I've been trying to get your attention all day. Is it something I said? Did I upset you?"

Here comes the guilt again. I gulped it down, forcing myself not to blurt out the truth immediately. _Well you see Jacob, I've got a guardian angel and that's where my mind's been all day. I'm hopelessly attracted to him but I'm not allowed to tell anyone about his deliciousness_.

"You didn't upset me", I murmured, squeezing him tightly. His lips brushed against my hair. The bell went but we made no move to go to class. I closed my eyes, happy to be in his arms.

"What is it then?" asked Jacob gently. I knew he was still curious. But I couldn't tell him. Edward had told me not to tell. Besides, he didn't seem too pleased to see Jacob's shirt in my room this morning. I didn't understand what had gotten into him but he acted like what a father would do.

"I guess it's just PMS", I said with a nervous laugh. Jacob laughed too, his chest shaking in silent laughter. I was happy he bought the lie. I hated lying to him. And I was glad that I wasn't caught because my blush had already made its appearance on my face.

"You're such a girl", he teased, ruffling my hair, "And here I thought you were dying or something."

"Shouldn't you two be in class?" Snapped a voice.

I jumped slightly, looking up to see Miss Beautiful Hale striding towards us. She was wearing a red suite today with matching high heels. I hated the fact that she was taller than me, I felt like I was in kindergarten again.

"What's your lesson?" she asked, her eyes fixated on me. I had no idea why she looked so angered at me. Lately, I had been picked on a lot in my English class. She acted as if I kicked her cat.

Her long blonde hair was flicked back and her odd golden eyes were cold.

"We've both got biology", said Jacob coming to my rescue.

"Get a move on then", she said icily. Jacob righted me, giving me a slight push towards our class. I felt my cheeks burn in embarrassment as I stumbled. Of course my best friend was there to steady me.

"Hurry up", she hissed as we walked down the hallway.

I felt myself shudder.

--

**Edward's POV**

**(From the last chapter)**

**"The question is", Carlisle spoke, "do you trust her enough to tell her?"**

**"Absolutely not", shrieked Rosalie bringing her hand down to smack the unused dinning table. This time she was really catching everyone's attention. Her eyes were livid, glaring venom straight at me.** _Don't you dare, Edward! Don't you dare!_

"Surely it's Edward's decision", murmured Esme, smiling at me faintly. _If you trust her then we all do too_.

"It's the whole family's decision", Rosalie pointed out. "This affects all of us here."

"Well I think he should tell her", Alice cut in before Rosalie opened her mouth again, "Or things are going to get complicated. Once Bella knows, I can meet her! Then we'll be the best of friends."

_Well, son? What are you going to do?_ "Edward?" Carlisle was looking at me expectantly. I took in a deep breath though I didn't need it. Was I going to tell Bella? The last vision from Alice had practically scarred me. She was running away, _from me_. She looked terrified.

"If you love her, tell her", said Esme quietly, "she deserves to know."

"She doesn't care about him", spat out Rosalie, "he's wasting his time. Isabella Swan is human and taken. She has a boyfriend."

_What? I have not seen this. Edward? Edward?!_ Alice turned to me, wide eyed and shocked.

"What are you talking about?" I glared at Rosalie, "She told me herself that she wasn't in a relationship."

_Calm down_, Jasper almost whispered in his thoughts.

I knew Bella wouldn't lie to me. Would she? No, of course not. She thought I was her guardian angel. I would protect her as one and that mean she would trust me. I knew she trusted me already. But surely she wouldn't lie?

"Really?" Rosalie smirked. Her mind flashed with pictures and images.

_Bella stood in a corridor with her arms around a tall boy. The boy had long black hair and darkly tanned skin. His arms were around Bella, _my_ Bella. His lips brushed against the top of her head, over her hair._

"_I guess its just PMS", Bella laughed into his chest, burying her face against him. He laughed along with her. The picture was a perfect symbol of a couple. Boyfriend and girlfriend hugging each other, holding onto each other._

_Believe me now?_ Rosalie started at me triumphantly.

"Who was that?" I hissed through my teeth, the image of Bella holding onto someone else was still burning through my mind.

"Jacob Black", Rose answered simply.

"She told me herself", I whispered in disbelief. Rosalie must've been talking about someone else. Surely, it must've been a mistake.

"Bella and Jacob have been close for years", Rosalie snapped at me, "She's obviously lying if she tells you otherwise. She's human, Edward, they're all the same. And you _cannot tell her_."

Her mind flooded with pictures, flashes of two beings. Just Bella and the boy, Jacob, always walking together, sitting together, holding hands, laughing. Always together. Always with him.

I felt my skin crawl, my instinct burning to roar out.

"Enough Rosalie", warned Jasper.

"What exactly is your relationship status with this girl, Edward?" Carlisle asked. His thoughts were based on my well being and happiness.

"She's his future wife", Alice cut in before I got to speak.

"But she's human", said Emmett looking confused.

"He's going to change her", Alice told him in an obvious tone.

"No!" I snapped, unable to contain myself, "Bella will stay human."

"You will leave her alone then", Rosalie said to me. She stared straight at me, her cold golden eyes looking right at mine. "She's human, she stays human. You're a vampire, you stay one, act like one. Stay _away _from her. Don't fall for a taken girl."

"She is not taken", I hissed. Rosalie took a step towards me, challenging me with her glare.

Her mind attacked me once more as she practically screamed the images of Bella with someone.

_Taken._

_She's taken_.

the words were thrown at me.

_Taken._

_Human._

_Jacob Black._

"Edward?" _We're your family, we can help you._ "Edward? What are you going to do?" asked Esme, staring at me with concern.

"She's mine", I whispered, before running straight out of the door and towards Bella's house.

--

It was too late. Whatever Rosalie wanted me to do, it was too late for that. Maybe if I had turned away from Bella on the first day I saw her. Nine years old and innocent. Maybe then I would be able to rip myself away from her.

But now, it was too late. I had touched her and my skin craved the moment when I could touch her again. I wanted my lips and hers to make contact. I wanted _her_. Not her blood, though the monster inside of me craved that too. I wanted Bella.

Alice was right. I had fallen for the fragile human girl. Seeing her in someone else's mind made me understand what I needed to know.

My body had changed for her. I had built up an amount of self control already. The physical attraction was there. She was a woman and I was man. She was beautiful and now, I loved her.

My feet pounded softly on the forest floor as I dodge the trees, running, racing towards my destination. I didn't care that Bella was holding someone else earlier. She was mine. My wild instinct had already adapted for that. I wouldn't be letting go. I couldn't. Not without knowing if she didn't want me either.

I scaled the walls of the house easily; listening out for the minds that I knew would be there. There were two snoring minds which I understood as her adopted parents. And then there was Bella with her soft, even breathing.

I reached her window and landed inside with a gentle thud.

She was awake, though it was half past midnight. She lay on her back, staring at the white blank ceiling. Her hands were fisting the sheets as she rested on it. She was covered with small black shorts and a white vest top.

"Who is Jacob Black?" I didn't mean for my words to come out in a growl but they did. Bella flinched back, startled and slowly sat up. I was momentarily mesmerized by her beauty, soft and innocent yet powerful enough to intoxicate the opposite sex. A vampire of the opposite sex.

"I...Jake? Jacob's my friend", Bella stuttered, seeming surprised. I walked towards her and she watched my movements closely. "I told you about him this morning. Remember? The shirt and the..."

"Your friend?" I asked her carefully. Bella blushed bringing her knees to her chest. She smiled faintly, her eyes tracing over me. I so wanted to know what she was thinking at that moment, staring at me and paint colouring her cheeks.

"I...Are you jealous?" she blurted out suddenly, then reddened the blood darkening.

I was taken back by her conclusion. Her precise and correct conclusion. Was I truly that see-through? I calmed myself down, wondering how Bella predicted where I was going with this

"Why would you think that?" I asked her, sitting at the end of the bed. Bella crossed her legs, resting her hands on the lap as she looked at me nervously.

"Well...I...don't...I just presumed by the way...you're acting..." she trailed off in a quieter voice.

"I have certain resources tell me that you're close with _Jacob_." I couldn't stop myself from sounding sour and bitter. It reminded me of a hormonal teenager who had gotten scowled from his parents.

"Of course we're close", Bella informed me, "We're best friends, Edward. And I didn't tell him. About you, I mean. I'm keeping you a secret. But I hate lying to my friend, it's hard."

"So you're close with him..."

"close in a friend way", Bella finished off for me. She narrowed her eyes at me for a couple of seconds. "You told me that it isn't wise for me to be in a relationship and I'm not. I don't think I will be for a while."

She smiled at me, content with her explanation and I couldn't help but smile back at her. The air buzzed with certain electricity. Bella reached out, placing her warm soft hands on mine. It was a small human gesture that appeared amazingly huge to me.

"Bella, do you trust me?" I whispered, Alice's words playing in my head. _Tell her Edward. You have to tell her_.

I hated the last vision that Alice had shown me. It had ruined everything that I hoped to happen. I couldn't tell Bella that I was a vampire, not now. Could I? She was only human after all, she'd run, scared and panicked.

But I wanted to her know who I truly was.

"Yes", she murmured back.

I took her hand, holding it in my cold lifeless ones. She did not protest from the cool temperature. Bella closed her eyes, a small faint smile displayed on her lips. I leaned in close, inhaling gently, controlling myself.

Her skin and scent was fragranced and mouth watering. Her blood flushed from her neck and cheek burned my throat. I leaned closer slowly until our lips touched. Just a light feather skim.


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter ten: Talk About Kissing

**Edward's POV**

I leaned closer slowly until our lips touched. Just a light feather skim. The warmth from her lips ignited mine. It was like a fire, scorching in between the both of us. I've felt fire before. I felt the hot, heat of burn in my throat when I was a newborn, when I needed to feed badly. But this wasn't anything like it. This was a good heat, a good flame that was blazing with Bella and I.

But I had to remind myself that I was a vampire. If I slipped up, get too lost in the moment I could kill Bella. Just a little slip and I could bite her and lost control. I checked myself before moving my lips with hers again. The fire blazed on heavily and I loved it.

My lips moved, moulding with hers gently. I felt her heat. I felt her heat pounding noisily against her chest. I felt the trust she was putting in me though her human instincts should be telling her to run.

Something warm and soft touched my head hesitantly. I moved closer to Bella. Her fingers entwined with my hair, gripping tighter and pulling me closer to her until our chests were pressed up close.

This was totally new to me. I had never done this before. Never in my life had I ever been this close to a human being. I repelled them. They kept away from me. I touched them as little as possible knowing that they would comment of my lack of warmth. They would fear me, be intimidated by me.

Yet Bella was the one who approached me herself. She was the one to take the first step and walk towards me. I hadn't been touched in so long that it felt right. So right, just right to be touched by Bella.

After minutes, years or centuries, eventually I pulled back. I held my breath, and closed my eyes trying to relive that short little moment. I didn't pull completely back. Bella was still a couple of inches away. I could feel her panting, her breaths hitting my face.

"Edward", she whispered. It came out as a moan, an erotic sound that I wanted to hear over and over again. I didn't open my eyes. I stayed completely still, trying to deal with explanations later. I felt Bella's hand move in my hair, she was brushing the strands away from my forehead.

"Edward?" She whispered again. This time it came out as more of a question. I lifted up my head and opened my eyes. Her big brown orbs were staring right back into me. I felt like she could see my soul, if I had one. Surely it would be black and lifeless.

"Are you allowed to do that?" Bella asked, pulling her head back a little and tilting her head to the left. A faint smile played on her lips.

"Do what?" My voice was low and husky, I tried to smooth it out by clearing my throat. I was a vampire, it made no difference anyhow.

"Kiss me", she whispered softly. I didn't know whether she was asking me to or answering my question but nevertheless I leaned in close. Our lips touched again. I hesitantly moved my hand up to her shoulder, ready to steady her if anything went wrong or I lost control. Bella pressed her mouth tighter against mine. It was hot and wet and soft and beautiful.

She moaned suddenly, one of her hands stroking the back of my neck, pushing her body fully on me. I steadied her, pulling back but not leaving her lips because I wan't ready to do that just yet. I was surprised at myself for not once thinking of wanting to bite her. I was shocked at the way my teeth were so close to her yet the venom hadn't pooled my mouth yet.

Bella pulled back this time, panting again. My mouth trailed down her jaw line as I inhaled her beautiful freesia scent. I opened my mouth and pressed my tongue to her pulse. The beating rhythm pounding on my tongue. If I could just sink my teeth...

I closed my mouth immediately, kissing down collarbone, her fleshy skin and all I could reach. Bella moved backwards until she was laying on her pillow. I was hovering over her, careful not to be crushing her small fragile frame.

"As much...as I'd like...to carry on", Bella murmured breathlessly, gripping my hair to get my attention, "Can we just talk...for a second? Edward?"

**Bella's POV**

Damn me! Stupid big mouth!

What the hell is wrong with me?

I was there, a fantasy so real that my mind was exploding at the thought, Edward's body pressed with mine. His lips licking and sucking at my skin, trailing erotic kisses down my neck. His hands were rubbing up and down my sides, making pleasure and friction all at once.

"I am so sorry", Edward said, pulling off of me at once. One minute he was on top of me and the next he was on the other side of the room. My body missed his at once. His voice was low and husky, beautiful as always but more sexy and attractive.

"No wait!" I called out in case he was planning of flying out of the window again, "I just want to talk. Don't go."

"I shouldn't have taken advantage of you like that Bella, I'm so sorry –"

"It's alright", I said quickly, "You didn't take...advantage. I was...sort of giving it to you."

I felt myself heat up from top to toe of embarrassment. Edward stood straight, his back pressing up against the wall and he stared at me. I threw my legs to the side of the bed and walked slowly towards him.

"Are you ok?" I asked him quietly. Edward seemed tensed up, his hands by his side, his piercing eyes looking directly at me. "Edward?"

"You should really stay away from me, Bella", he whispered, his voice barely above audible. I didn't understand what he was saying. Stay away from him? He was saying it like I could do something like that. Didn't he know how much of my time he occupied? Even when he wasn't there, my mind completely evolved around him.

"What do you mean?" I asked him, curiously. He tore his gaze away from me, choosing to stare at the floor in a hard intense way. I wondered if there were more blue boxes he was planning on locating in my bedroom underfloor.

"I shouldn't have kissed you without your permission", he said, changing the subject immediately, "It was unreasonable of me to do so. Also, I probably shouldn't have anyway. I'm your –"

"Did you want to kiss me?" I interrupted him before he carried on talking rubbish. He turned to face me. The moonlight outside lit dimly. His jaw looked more prominent, strong and set. His eyes were glowing, literally, glowing green and bright. His lips, curved, soft and beautiful was in a frown.

"I...that does not matter", he answered, "I shouldn't have done it. I should've probably –"

"It matters to me. You can't just kiss me like that and then brush me off when I ask you about it."

"Did _you_ want to kiss me?" He shot back as a retort. Then mumbled something under his breath that I didn't hear.

"Yes", I said despite the flame covering my neck and cheeks. "You haven't answered my question."

"I thought you said I was your guardian angel?" Edward spoke through gritted teeth. "Surely you don't kiss _all_ your guardian angels like that. Don't you think what we just did was inappropriate?"

I took another step closer to him. Edward noticed the move and glanced away. I took in a deep breath before talking. Whatever I was going to say would either have Edward running for his life, or possibly just humiliate myself. None of those were favours for me.

"I'm not going to deny the fact that I'm a little bit attracted to you", I mumbled in the lowest voice I could muster, hoping that he wouldn't hear me. I stared at the floor, waiting for his response.

When he didn't say anything back for two whole minutes (yes, I was counting) I began to think that maybe he didn't hear me after all. I risked embarrassment again, and tilted my head up to see...

He wasn't there.

Suddenly something cold brushed against the back of my neck. I tensed up from the shock. Surprised that Edward wasn't where I thought he would be and surprised because his fingers on my neck made a pleasurable feeling run up and down my spine.

"I didn't know that", Edward whispered. His lips brushing on my neck. I shivered from the cold touch. I tried to turn but his hands kept me in place, holding me so that my back was pressed against his firm, hard abs.

"You haven't shown or acted on the fact that you're a little bit attracted to me", Edward murmured, his cool breath tickling my skin. I stared ahead because I was completely paralyzed. "but you tease me way too much, Bella..."

I was about to protest but he cut me off.

"Wearing these shorts", he explained, tugging lightly on my sleeping shorts, "so that you're whole long creamy legs is on display for me."

The room was so quiet apart from his soothing, low voice. My heart was pounding inside of chest. I felt like I was floating again.

His arms snaked around my stomach, under my shirt and caressing my skin. His own skin was unbelievably cold and icy but smooth nevertheless. His lips, parted, was pressed right under my jaw on my neck. I shuddered.

"We're not supposed to", Edward whispered into my ear. I had no idea what he was talking about now. My mind was completely lost, drowning in the pleasure that he was giving me. This new feeling, this new sensation that glided through my veins and made hot liquid pool between my legs...I loved it.

"But I can't fight against myself", Edward carried on talking, his lips brushing over my neck, my collarbone. His hands were smoothing my skin, his finger tracing patterns on my hip bone, over the top of my panty lines. "You've always been mine... I want to keep you now, Bella...please."

I turned around, twisting my back my head. My lips met with Edward's immediately and I was in heaven. He repositioned himself, moving his hand to hold the small of my back, pulling me closer to him. My hands flew up to his neck and hair as our lips continued to dance. I stretched upwards, standing on the very tip of my toes to reach him better.

"I want to kiss you, to make you mine", Edward whispered against my lips. He turned us both around and the next thing I knew, I was on my back laying on me bed. Edward was propped up on one elbow, staring at me.

His fingers brushed against my face, igniting the blush on my cheeks. Edward leaned closer against but did not kiss me this time. "I don't think you'd like me very much if you knew the real me, Bella. But I'm a selfish creature...I want you nevertheless."

I stared into his eyes. His words made no sense at all. Did he really want me? Could Edward be attracted to me as I was to him? I didn't think so. He was beyond human. I was simple, plain Bella. Just me.

But if he wanted me, then why did he doubt that I wouldn't like the real him? Wasn't he just here to be my angel? Or was there something else in all of this?

I felt so confused all of a sudden. Trying to piece together that Edward had been telling me tonight. Asking me about Jacob, all of a sudden. I swear I could detect a slight hint of jealousy when he said his name. What was that about?

I mean, one minute he was kissing me and the next he was telling me that he wasn't good for me. It was like he was battling the thought inside of his head.

I took in a deep breath before talking.

"Edward?"

"Yes, Bella?"

"You're not an angel, are you?"


	11. Chapter Eleven

Chapter eleven: She Knows

**_Edward's POV_**

Her flat stomach was warm under my large cool hands. She did not shiver. My lips were brushing a space under her ear. Her whole body was radiating heat. Beautiful, warmth and comforting heat. Bella breathed out calmly. I did not breathe at all. I was holding my breath, making sure that the monster inside of me was in check.

_So far so good._

Her scent was so much strong by the way that I was holding her. My chest was pressed up close to her back and my arms were wound around her waist, her front. Her hands were limp on either side and she stared straight ahead.

We stood in the middle of the room as I made my confessions. She had to know. She had to see. She had to feel and realise what she was doing to me. These things did not happen easily to vampires. We did not change as easily as human did. Emotions were stronger for us, permanent. Something as strong as love and want and need was so strong for me, now that it was happening for the first time in my life.

And when she said, when she admitted that she was attracted to me, it felt like a big weight was lifted off of my chest. I did not know if Bella had feelings for me. The way she acted around me showed nothing about her feeling. I could not read her mind. I did not know what she was thinking. Her pulse quickened and slowed down around me. She showed no fear like other human. She showed no emotions as I wished for her to.

But the way she admitted her attraction made me feel something I had not felt in a long time. It was odd to me why a human would think this way. Especially since I had not shown my emotions to her. Yet, I was amazed once more by Bella. She did nothing but amaze me.

And then she spoke the words.

"Edward?"

My lips brushed on her jaw, no longer was I hiding the fact that I wanted her. I could not. If I did, she would offer herself to someone other. I could not have that. She was mine. Truly mine. I did not share.

"Hmm?" I responded distractedly, feeling fascinated by the light red colour that flushed Bella's neck when I grazed it slightly with my lips. She took in a deep breath then. Her fingers tightened in my hair, pulling my head for me to look at her. I did.

She stared deep in my eyes as she spoke, her swirls of brown eyes staring deep into mine.

"You're not an angel, are you?" she asked. Though she asked it, there was no doubt that this was a statement from her, not a question. _You're not an angel._

At that moment it felt like I had been exposed in front of Bella. She was not asking it. She knew. But the question was, how did she know? And more importantly, how much did she know? If she knew too much, would something be wrong? Would this change anything?

How long did Bella know?

"Why would you say that?" I asked her, answering her question with a question itself. She bit her bottom lip, her eyes still fixed on mine as she pondered how to answer.

"Angels don't get jealous", she told me. I straightened out, moving back so we could both sit up properly on the bed. Bella crossed her legs, staring down at her fiddling fingers. I moved back to give her space.

Would this be the moment when I should tell her? Would this be the moment that she'd finally get scared, realise the situation and go running, screaming away from me?

"You're not an angel", whispered Bella, still not looking me in the eyes. She sighed heavily, her fingers brushing against each other. I watched as she nibbled on her bottom lip almost nervously.

"No", I said finally, "I'm not."

I did not know why I admitted it. I could've lied to her. There were plenty of explanations that I could've given to Bella, convincing her that I was truly the saint she originally thought of me. But what was the point? If I truly did have feelings for this girl, I could live pretend to be someone I was not.

I knew that I wasn't good for her. I knew that fact yet it did not stop me from wanting her. She was fragile and weak, merely human. I was strong, too strong. She was innocent and kind and one of the most beautiful humans I had ever seen. Whereas I was a monster, with the darkest of souls if any at all.

"But you're not human", Bella stated. I looked up at her. This was the moment. I had to admit it to her. My biggest secret. If she went running, would I go after her? I was too selfish, I wanted her too much. I was praying to whoever was up there, if there was anyone up there at all, that Bella wouldn't run. Bella would accept me for whom I was. That Bella would love me back.

"I am not human", I told her in a quiet voice. She finally looked up at me, her eyes glazing and twinkling brightly. Bella bit her bottom lip once more, tilting her head to the left.

I was confused still. She looked so casual about this conversation. Then her lips broke out into a lazy, sleepy smile.

"I want to go to sleep now", she said quietly. My eyebrows furrowed in confusion. Bella wriggled on the bed, laying back and placing her head on the pillow.

I stared at her utterly confused. She wasn't going to comment on my last sentence? I had just told her that I was inhumane and she wasn't going to do anything about it? She wanted to go to sleep?

"You wish to sleep?" I asked her, moving back off the bed to stand. She nodded and yawned, clapping her hand over her mouth immediately.

"Will you be here until tomorrow?" she asked, her eyes fluttering close slowly.

"I've just told you that I am not human and you want me here still?" I asked. It was completely absurd. I did not understand this girl at all. When a normal person would be running away, terrified with fear she was relaxing on her bed asking me to return to her.

"I don't care", Bella said with a slightly shrug.

"You don't care if I'm a monster?"

"You're not", she said, shaking her head. Then smiled slowly. "Edward...how could someone like _you_ be a monster? You're not human, I understand that but surely you're something far, far much better."

I turned away, laughing humourlessly. Oh how wrong she was.

"No, I'm not", I told her firmly, "Never believe that, Bella because I'm not. I should stay away from you. We should've never mingled. We should've never met. This is wrong, a mistake."

"This is a mistake?" she asked quietly, a touch of hurt in her voice. I tried to ignore and focus.

"If should stay away from you..."

"Don't say that", Bella snapped, sitting up and staring at me sharply. "We _have_ met, and you are not staying away from me. I...I won't let you."

"You don't need to. Because I won't", I said in a quiet voice, staring at the floor. "Like I said Bella, I'm too selfish for that."

I knew that I wouldn't leave her. I wouldn't, I couldn't. But she had to know what she was putting herself in. So far Bella acted like I told her just casual news. She did not seem to understand the proximity of this conversation.

She crossed her legs, I could see from the corner of my eyes. Finally, I brought up my gaze, looking at her in the silence that had now settled between us. I couldn't help but think how beautiful she looked, her hair was slightly messy, a gorgeous mess around her face.

Her eyes were wide, innocent and staring at me with a sudden desperate pleading. Bella reached out, pushing up her hands towards me. I took it with my left hand, wondering why she wanted me to touch her hand this way.

"I'm selfish too", Bella whispered, looking up at me from under her long eyelashes. "You're so unreal and... Just different, Edward. It doesn't matter what you are, I don't care. I just want you here."

She tugged gently on my hand, not able to budge me at all. I obliged to what she wanted, stepping forwards until my knee hit the bed.

"How can you be so calm?" I murmured, searching frantically on her face for any signs at all of a normal reaction. Bella merely shrugged. "Aren't you scared of the fact that I'm not a human?"

"I feel safe when I'm with you", she admitted quietly, "The first time I saw you...all those years ago Edward, it was so unreal...so magically and brilliantly unreal for me."

I didn't understand why she could speak so easily. Her breathing was normal; her heartbeat was wasn't fast or speedy. In fact she acted as if a vampire wasn't sitting on her bed in her bedroom in the middle of the night. Then again, she didn't know I was a vampire. All Bella knew was that I wasn't human. Would her views on me change much, if she found out what monster I was exactly?

"What if I'm dangerous?" I whispered to her, "What if me being inhuman is dangerous, Bella? "

She shook her head before I had finished talking. "Edward, I'm _absolutely_ certain that there's nothing dangerous about you. _Nothing_. The reason I thought you were an angel in the first place was because of how you made me feel. And...I know that I probably sound silly but I don't care, Edward. I don't care what you are...I really like you. I like you anyway."

"You like me?" I questioned, my voice turning bitter. I snatched my hands away from her, running to the other side of the room. Bella stared at me, looking shocked. "You like me Bella? You think that's enough to stop me from killing you?"

Her eyes widened.

She liked me. As much as my unbeating heart soared with those words, I also felt like it wasn't enough. I wanted her fully, I wanted more. I didn't just like her. I _loved_ her. Alice was right. But Bella knew nothing of what she was saying. Even _liking_ me was wrong.

The monster inside of me roared at the sight of her exposed blush. Her heart was finally speeding up. She gasped. A normal reaction, at last.

"I could kill you Bella", I told her in a hard voice, "The only reason I'm still here now if because I'm attracted to you. My...kind, we don't mix with you."

"Why not?" She half whispered.

"Because you're like cattle to us", I told her bitterly, "I know I shouldn't be here....but I can't help it."

"Because you're attracted to me too?" she asked, referring to my previous comment. How typical of Bella to pick out something like this when I just told her that I could kill her. I was practically laying everything out for her, so that she could see and understand. I did not want to tell Bella that I was a vampire, I wanted to her find out by herself. I wanted the right reaction out of her.

But what was the right reaction?

Half of me wanted her to go running in the other direction, screaming and never wanting to see me again. The other half wanted her to let me hold her.

Before I could help myself, had gone towards her again. I sat right next to Bella, not looking into her eyes. She stared at me, her heart rate slowing down instead of going faster which was a normal reaction to humans when vampires got close.

Her scent was beautiful, fragranced in the most delicious way. I pushed away that thought as Bella's small hands covered mine.

"Just tell me that you'll stay", she whispered in a desperate pleading tone.

I nodded feebly. I would stay, for now.


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter twelve: Attempt at intimacy.

**Bella's POV**

My life had changed.

Before, I used to wake up to my adopted parents. I used to make sure to tell them both that I loved them. I used to hold them tight and whisper how much I appreciated them at least once a day. They deserved that. Charlie and Renee were good people.

I used to walk to school every morning. I used to sludge through the wet, the stupid muddy town of forks to school. The weather, wet and cold, two things I don't really like. I used to go to school and face the many people who would stare me in the face. I wasn't exactly popular but the snickering and staring still hadn't disappeared. Especially since I would trip and embarrass myself daily.

I used to meet with my best friend. The best guy in the whole wide world. Jacob Black with the friendly wide grin and beautiful coppery skin. He was the only guy my age who I trusted, who I was actually close to. Who I could share my deepest, darkest secrets to. And I did. I used to.

When I would arrive home, I would occupy myself. Nothing extravagant, nothing special. I did not have any exciting hobbies apart from reading and possibly writing. I wasn't a big fan of parties. I didn't go out much apart from to La Push to visit Jacob on the beach once or twice. I didn't go shopping and squeal about boys like the other girls.

I used to have nightmares.

I used to have images, voices and screams that would haunt me and continued to haunt me for the rest of my life, so I thought. The nightmares were of my parents. The night of their death. A simple death, a death that left me unscarred physically yet scarred so deeply emotionally.

I used to be simply Bella Swan, ordinary girl and plain Jane. But now, I had changed.

--

"Aren't you the least bit curious?" Whispered Edward, staring at me intently.

It had been two weeks. Two weeks since my life changed. We now sat, in the dead of the night, in the middle of my bed again. My room had become my favourite place in the world. Every night I would meet Edward here, sometimes he would come after school if Renee and Charlie were both at work.

His finger traced the skin under my neck. I tried to swallow before speaking. His cold fingers were smooth and soft, no matter how flushed it made me feel. I felt myself heat up. Edward licked his lips, his eyes training over my eyes, my mouth and down to my neck.

I hesitated before speaking. "No...not really."

He noticed my hesitation.

"you don't want to know anything?" he whispered at me. "anything at all?"

I did. I would be lying if I said that I wasn't curious about Edward because I definitely was. But every time I thought about asking him any questions at all, I thought of him running away from me. Would he do that? Would I cope?

I was ok with being with Edward even if I didn't know much about him. I didn't care who he was, though it didn't meant I didn't want to know. I wanted to know so much. Did he have a last name? What was his favourite colour? Was I the only human he had 'visited'? For all I knew, Edward could have other girls or women he was attracted to. I knew nothing about him truly. Nothing at all.

"I guess I do", I said with a light shrug, "But...I mean, I'm curious but it doesn't mean I have to know it. I don't want to scare you away with my questions, Edward."

He chuckled darkly. "I don't want to scare _you_ away with my answers, Bella."

"But you won't", I said persistently. Edward rolled his eyes. He gave a frustrated sigh then stopped tracing my neck with his finger. He sat up, pushing himself away from me. I almost whimpered from the lost of contact.

"How about this", he began in a bargaining voice, "You ask me three questions, I'll answer them. I won't get scared away by your questions...and you...well, I want to see your reaction anyway."

"Do you expect my reactions to be that bad?" I asked him, slyly moving closer so that my thigh was brush against his jeans. I placed my hand on his lap casually. He didn't miss the movement.

"It depends on the questions", he answered me, taking my hand and stroking the back of it.

He brought it to his lips before blowing a cool windy gust across my nails. Then proceeded to kiss everyone of them. I was sure that my face was tomato red by this time. No one had ever paid this much attention to me before. I had gone out on dates before, had boyfriends but never was it this intimate. Never this unreal and beautiful.

"If my reactions are bad...", I started, "What does... I mean, _I_ don't think I'll have a bad reaction because I don't really care. What you tell me won't affect the way I feel, Edward."

"What you ask won't affect the way I feel either", he murmured, leaning forwards.

I stayed very still as Edward placed his lips on the hollow of my throat, something he seemed to be doing every night. For a couple of seconds, I felt his lips tremble against my skin. I restricted myself from moaning, because I knew that would be an embarrassing noise to make.

He pulled back all too soon, brushing his lips on my cheek, over my eyelids instead. Edward applied the smallest pressure on my shoulder, making me lie back. I fell back on my pillow as he trailed soft kisses all over my face. He ended up on the side of my mouth before he stopped, froze. My eyes, which were previously closed, opened immediately.

"How _do_ you feel?" I whispered, my curiosity getting the best of me.

"Will my answer scare you away?" he asked half serious with a teasing smile at his lips. Edward hovered over my body. I could feel his body against mine though he supported his own weight with his elbows. I loved being so close to him.

"Not if mine will scare you", I told him.

"I feel...very protective of you Bella", he admit, his eyes sweeping over my face, hesitating as he watched my expression. "I am selfish because even though we're not supposed to be together, naturally, I care for you too much...want you too much to even consider that thought. And now that I'm here...I don't think I can ever stay away again."

"I don't want you to", I said fiercely. I felt like we had gone over this before. He didn't want to stay away but the idea shouldn't never crossed his mind.

I couldn't bear to even think of what would become of me if Edward didn't come to me every night. Not once in those two weeks had I had a night mare. Not once had I woken up, shaking and sweating and half crying.

All the time he was here, I felt strong. I felt happy.

"You don't have to make the choice yet", he murmured against my jaw line, "You don't know much about me yet Bella. When you know the...full story, then you may decide whether I'm for you to keep or not."

"If for some stupid reason, I say that I don't want you...would you just...stay away?" I asked, pondering his answer.

Edward didn't answer.

Instead his fingers traced a beautiful pattern on the side of my forehead. I closed my eyes once more. His breaths, long and cool were fanning against my cheek.

"I love you..."

--

**Edward's POV**

To say that the words slipped out of my mouth wouldn't be accurate. I was thinking of them. Those three words that could really make or break a human mundane relationship. Human were really quite vain. A simple words, or a couple, could make them choose and decide the most absurd of things.

I watched as Bella's face turned from hesitant to shock to a blank mask.

I waited for her to say something.

She didn't.

Bella watched me for a long time. Her expression was unreadable. I casually just traced my finger over the pulsating flesh of skin on her neck. I could hear the rush of her blood. My mouth watered temporarily before I beat down the thought. My throat stung slight but I adjusted myself.

I had to remind myself that I wanted to do this. To be with her. Killing Bella, slipping up was not an option. I don't think I could, not anymore. Not because of the feelings of what I had confessed to her.

"Edward?" whispered Bella in a very slurring voice. I frowned to myself. I shouldn't be keeping her up late like this every night. She would be lacking sleep. It might affect her school work or physical state. Though, Bella always looked perfectly rested every morning.

"Bella?" I whispered her name just as she did with mine. A smile formed on her lips as she stared straight at me.

"Would you...love me even if _I_ wasn't human?" she asked quietly.

I quirked an eyebrow, wonder why she would ask me something like this. She did not comment on the fact that I just told her I loved her. Instead she brought it into her sentence very subtly.

"Yes. Of course, yes. Bella, it doesn't matter to me what you are", I told her sincerely. She had to know this. Technically she was a different species from me and that did not bother me. I loved her still. "you're still Bella to me. Still beautiful, inside and out."

"Good", she said, seeming pleased with my answer.

"Why did you ask?" I asked her curiously. How frustrating it was not to know her thoughts.

"I asked because I love you to Edward", she spoke softly, "And it doesn't matter to me what you are. You're still Edward to me. Still amazingly beautiful, inside and out."

She replayed my words back to me. I open my mouth to speak but she cut me off.

"I know you're going to say that I don't know you yet", she carried on, "You're going to say that you're dangerous, that what we're doing is wrong and probably a mistake because we weren't met to be. But I know that we are."

She took in a deep breath before speaking. I watched as her lips moved. Her arms came around my neck, bringing me closer. I pushed the duvet cover between us so that she wouldn't get too close from my skin.

"I can be a human average girl and you can be the angelic whatever you are and it doesn't matter. Because this is the best thing that's ever happened to me. _you_ are the best thing that's ever happened to me, Edward."

And those words were probably ever spoken to me once in my whole life. And as it tumbled out of Bella's mouth, I felt an odd sensation on the pit of my stomach lift up. a churning, pleasant feeling was building up inside of me.

Bella finished off her speech by nibbling softly on her bottom lip nervously, watching my reaction. She was beautiful and that was my only thought. I couldn't help the lust that was springing up, crackling like pleasurable tension between us.

And then it was no longer about love. Something turned, just snapped immediately. And it was suddenly about lust. About the way Bella was so innocent yet so damn sexy at the same time.

It was about the way my body was angled so that my side was pressed into hers. It was about the way her fingers were tickling the back of my neck and knotting themselves into my unmanageable hair. It was about why I wanted to just bury myself into her beautiful, soft and marshmallow warmth and never, ever leave.

And I leaned in, not knowing or wanting to do anything else but to just kiss her. Our lips touched, the tingling sensation ran through my body. For a vampire who hadn't felt anything for a really long time, this was the scariest most wonderful feeling in the world. I loved it. I loved her.

My hand appeared behind her neck, holding her in place. Our lips danced and moved in sync. I moved to hover over her body, not controlling myself anymore. Bella arched her back, pushing up her warm, soft breasts into my chest. My lips left hers, but never leaving her skin. I loved the way she was panting my name, moaning out as it tumbled off her lips. I sucked and gently nibbled on her flesh, trailing hot kisses down her neck.

Her hands felt like hot metal when they touched my skin. I could feel her fingers brushing underneath my shirt and slowly, very slowly moving up to roam on my back. I could feel the material slipping upwards, exposing my back.

At the same time, my fingers gently pushed Bella's vest top strap. It slid down her shoulders showing more soft, beautiful skin to me. I continued my assault on her flesh, tasting and licking every bit I could get.

She wriggled underneath me, her hot breath hitting my face as she panted harder. My body was reacting quickly to our new position and I was sure she could feel it.

But I couldn't do this.

Could I?

What we were doing anyway?

More importantly, what were we _about_ to do?

"What's wrong?" Bella whispered. Her breathless voice brought me back to reality. I rolled off of her, laying on my back. Bella pushed herself on her elbow, supporting her body on her side as she looked at me in confusion.

"Edward?" she whispered again. "what's the matter?"

"Bella..." I sighed in frustration. How was I going to phrase this exactly? I loved Bella. I loved kissing her. I loved holding her and touching her. I wanted her. But we couldn't. We could never be intimate in that way. It would break her. _I_ would break her.

"Oh", she whispered in a dejected tone. My eyes snapped to her face wondering what conclusion she had just come to. Without me even having to say anything. It was so annoying not being able to read her mind.

"Oh what?" I asked.

"No it's ok", she said shaking her head, "You don't want to...I mean, it's obvious that..." her face darkened in a pink colour as she spoke, stumbling on her words. I ignored the fresh sweet smell and focused on her lips.

"Obvious that what?" I questioned her.

"Well...never mind", she mumbled, shaking her head again, "I guess I better go to sleep now..."

She looked at me expectantly for a couple of minutes, as if she was waiting for me to say something or do something. The problem was, I didn't know what. This was so messed up. she was human, I was a monster. I loved her and she loved me too. But would she love me as much when she found out what I truly was?

I placed my two hands against my face and sighed again. "We can't have sex."

"What?"

Her response came quickly.

"We can't have sex because you'll get hurt", I explained, my voice barely above audible.

"I can't avoid the pain, Edward", Bella mumbled. Without looking, I knew she was blushing nuclear. I could smell the heat. My throat burnt slightly. "It always hurts for the girls. Always the first time."

So she hadn't had sex before.

Somehow that pleased me. When I made love to her, it would be her first time. Just like it would be for me. We'd be perfect for each other.

"That's not what I mean", I carried on explaining, "I told you that I'm not human Bella. Please always, _always_ have that in mind when you're with me. My reactions are inhumane, my experiences are inhumane, everything about me is _inhumane_. I am not human."

"So?"

Something warm grasped my wrists. I could feel Bella trying to pry my hands away from my face. Her fragile human state wouldn't be able to budge me but I moved my hands anyway. Her face was merely inches away from mine. Our lips so close to colliding.

"So..."

"So because you're not human...you don't want me in that way?" she whispered.

"So", I said quickly, "Damn it. No Bella, that's not what I meant. I want you. I want you in _everyway_. You have no idea... it's just that...you don't know what I am yet, Bella. I can't make love to you until you know me properly. I _won't_ make love to you until you know everything."


	13. Chapter Thirteen

Chapter Thirteen: Back Tracking

**_Edward's POV_**

Last chapter:

"_I want you. I want you in everyway. You have no idea... it's just that...you don't know what I am yet, Bella. I can't make love to you until you know me properly. I won't make love to you until you know everything."_

There was a stunned silence where Bella seemed to be roaming her eyes all over my face. I never felt so exposed to a human before. She sighed, a soft deflated noise that made my stomach curl anxiously.

"Tell me", she whispered, barely audible. I was confused to what she was referring to.

"Tell you what?"

Bella pushed me away, sitting up against the backboard of the bed. She crossed her legs and pushed the bed sheet to the foot of the mattress. I watched as she tucked a piece of her hair behind her left ear in an irritated manner.

I could feel my lips twitching up in amusement as Bella pushed her hair back and manoeuvred herself so that she was facing me, her legs crossed and her face expectant.

"Tell me...everything", she said in a very business-like manner, "I won't run away screaming, I promise. Tell me. Tell me now."

I was taken back and once again surprised by her demand. She had said before that she didn't care and didn't want to know. I wanted to know why the change of heart.

"Bella, its not that easy...to explain", I murmured. She leaned forwards eagerly, her hands clasped together. I took them into my own.

"Are you the devil's son?" She asked, clearly mocking me now. I rolled my eyes. "See? You're not. It's not that bad, Edward. "

I shook my head at her, bringing her hands to my mouth. I could feel her pulse, the blood rushing through her body. Her hands were pale, a beautiful translucent colour that could look ghostly and unhealthy on anyone else. On Bella it looked like she was glowing.

"Worst than being the devil's offspring", I muttered, closing my eyes. Bella's warm hand met my lips. I concentrated hard enough and I could hear the pounding of her heart echoing in her veins now. It seemed like such a familiar beat for me now.

"Edward."

I brushed my lips over her knuckles.

"Edward!"

"Bella!" I mimicked her voice.

She wasn't amused when I opened one eye to see why she had gone silent.

"I thought you wanted to tell me", she said in a small voice.

How could I explain to her that I did want her to know? It would've been wonderful to have Bella know my stupid dark secret. But I could deny the fact that I had no faith. I was not sure that she'd just turn away as soon as she found out.

Who'd want to be with a vampire? I drained blood to live. I had killed before. I was a monster, there was no doubt about that. Even being here, even being with Bella was a crime for me. My kind were supposed to stay away from humans, apart from feeding time of course. Yet, here I was, coveting a precious innocent...

"It's not the right time", I sighed heavily as I placed her warm hand on my cheek. The strong smell of blood was definitely beginning to scorch my throat. I clenched down my jaw and concentrated against the sweet aroma that filled my nose.

"But I want to know now", she whispered, leaning in close. Our lips brushed and the kiss was short but we didn't deepen it. I let go of Bella's hands, cupping her face instead as I held her. She sighed against my lips, another beautiful sound that I was growing to love.

"Why?" I asked indifferently.

I froze as suddenly my nose was assaulted by a strong whiff of mouth watering fragrance. Bella's blush radiated off her face and neck, filling the air. I pulled back, inside battling with the monster that raged to sink my teeth into her...

In less than a second, I ripped myself off of the bed, flying backwards and hitting the wall as gently as I could. I had to close my eyes, clenching my jaw even tighter and concentrating on anything but that red substance.

"Edward? Edward, what's wrong?" Bella whispered in a desperate tone.

Slowly I opened my eyes. She had gotten off from her last position and was now at the end of the bed. Her face was flush and I could practically taste the rusty sweet smell. My throat burnt. My stomach twisted. Venom flooded my mouth but I swallowed it back.

"Edward?" she whispered again, moving to stand up.

"Don't come", I hissed immediately, not wanting her to fuel the fire that flamed my throat. She froze, her face crumbling into confusion and hurt. But I barely noticed.

It took everything that I could ever have not to run up to Bella and fill my needs right then. My self control was pressured and the pain I was in didn't help the situation.

"What's wrong?" Bella whispered, her voice shaking. I could hear her foot about to take another step forwards.

"stay there", I snapped, trying not to gulp in the large amounts of air with her beautiful scent in it. Her breath hitched but she obeyed.

"Don't move. Stay still", I ordered firmly, "I have to go. Bella...I...I'm sorry."

Without thinking twice, I ripped myself away from the spot I was standing it and practically flew out of the small gap of Bella's window. I could hear her calling my name but I didn't turn back. The nice cool air of the night filled up my nostrils and I rejoiced in the fact that Bella's scent no longer pained my throat. As soon as my feet softly touched the ground, I took off sprinting through the forest without looking back because I knew she'd be looking out of the window.

Bella would be confused. Better confused and hurt than dead.

As I got closer to the house my running sprint slowed down to an average run. The guilt and remorse flowed through me freely and I couldn't help it. I had just left her like that. I got too close, if I ever slipped up, if ever I didn't have the self control...

I couldn't let that thought continue in my head. It was almost blaspheme now, to hurt Bella. I couldn't. I wouldn't. I had to protect her. Just a simple conversation with her from tonight and I had to go running like the coward I was. Her scent was too strong and I was too close.

I had tried to familiarise myself with her fragrance, to make sure that my body knew the limits of my self control when I was with her. Apparently that wasn't good enough.

_Hunt, Edward. You need to hunt. Jasper and I will come with you_. Alice stepped out of the house with Jasper by her side. They didn't look back at me, instead they started sprinting through the forest, hand in hand.

It was no doubt that Alice saw what had happened with me and Bella tonight. I followed them silently. Alice was right, I needed to hunt.

--

**_Bella's POV_**

My hands fisted. I could feel cold sweat plastering my clothes to my body. My heart bashed against my ribcage, demanding to be let out.

I sat upright, sucking air in greedily and panting hard.

A small light through my open window told me that it was already morning. The cold air entered and I clutched my bed sheets around me tighter. Turning to my left I realised it was 5:59am.

I jump suddenly as the 5:59 turned into a blinking 6:00am. The annoying beeping sound rang out and I reached over to turn off my morning alarm. Looking back at the window, yesterday's events flashed before my eyes.

He left.

I didn't know what happened.

We were talking normally one minute and the next he turned...cold. Edward suddenly snatched himself away from my embrace and was on the other side of the room. As far away from me as possible. When I tried to approach him as carefully as I could, he snarled at me, almost begging me to stay back. To stay away from him.

I didn't know what happened at all.

And then, he was gone.

The silent tears streamed down my tears as I spent the rest of the night staring out of the window, hoping and wishing that he'd come back to me. at half past four in the morning, eyes puffy and red I turned away from the window, leaving it open as far as it would go and scrambled under my duvet to dive into unconsciousness.

--

"Wow Bella, you look crap", Jacob announced happily to me as soon as I stepped through the school gates. I glared at him.

"Thanks", I muttered sourly. He placed his arm around me.

"Nightmare?"

"Something like that", I sighed as we continued to walk towards the building. The bell rang and students scrambled around, walking glumly to class.

"Why don't you tell me stuff anymore?" Jacob asked in his complaining tone. I simply shrugged him off. With an exasperated sigh, he stalked off to our first lesson.

I couldn't stop the disappointment and hurt that covered me like a wave. Not to forget embarrassment. The way Edward had tried to wriggle out of the conversation we were having was enough for me. He didn't want to have sex. Not with me at least.

It was obvious that he was using that excuse about me not knowing him completely. I didn't really care what it was, but if it mattered to him for me to know then why didn't he just tell me?

"Question thirty-two", someone hissed, breaking me out of my thoughts. I turned to see Jacob throwing an English text book on my desk.

"What?"

"Miss Hale said to do question thirty-two", he whispered, glancing towards the front. Miss Beautiful looked up at that exact moment. I looked down, blushing to realise that my book was closed and whilst everyone had started an attempt, my pen was still sitting innocently in my pencil case.

"Is there a problem Mr Black?" The teacher asked, standing up. Her gaze was fixed sternly on me though she addressed Jacob.

He coughed nervously. "Um. No. None at all."

"Good. Turn around and face the front then. Miss Swan?"

"Yes, Miss?" I mumbled looking up.

"Stop distracting Mr Black. Finish the question and bring it to the front", Miss Hale snapped, "Why do you look like you haven't slept in days?"

A couple of kids snickered. I lowered my head in embarrassment.

"I..."

"Whatever. Just don't fall asleep in my class", she said, rolling her blue eyes, "Why have the rest of you stopped writing? Get to wok. Now."

I picked up my pen immediately and began scribbling down. Jacob turned around and offered me a sympathetic smile. I smiled back to him and felt guilty once more.

--

I sat on the grass with Jacob next to me. he was currently stuffing his face with a ham and cheese sandwich. I rolled my eyes at him.

It was lunchtime and surprisingly not too cold so I suggested to Jacob that we sit outside. The sun was not out, much to my dismay but it wasn't wet which was a miracle.

"What's wrong?" Jake asked though his mouth was full so it came out as 'Whaff mong?'

"Nothing", I said with a light shrug.

"Look...I don't know what happened", he started out, chewing away the food quickly so he could speak, "but you don't talk to me anymore. You're always day dreaming. You're always far away. You're here in person, but really you're not."

"I know", I sighed heavily. I was here but my mind was with Edward.

"But today...did something happen last night?" He asked cautiously.

I shook my head.

"Bella."

I lay back and closed my eyes.

"Bella!"

"Jacob!" I imitated his voice. Opening one eye I could see Jake was glaring at me mockingly. I giggled at his stern face.

"Can...can I talk to you about something?"

I opened both of my eyes and sat up. Jake seemed to have finished his sandwich.

"That was quick", I remarked, looking to see if he threw it to the side or something.

"What was?"

"Nevermind. What d'you wanna talk about?" I asked curiously.

"Oh, I was thinking that –"

"Black!"

I jumped suddenly, turning around to see the school gym teacher making his way towards me and Jake. Mr McCarty was the fantasy of all the girls in Forks High. There were rumours that he was dating Miss Beautiful Hale but no one knew for sure.

"Sir?" Jake stood up, pulling with easy force.

"Jacob Black, why did I not see you at football tryouts last night?" Mr McCarty asked, running his hands through his curly dark hair. I couldn't help but admire the muscles flexing on his upper arm. He looked like a serious weight lifter.

"I'm not interested in football", Jake answered, obviously not aware of how I was drooling over his gym teacher's muscles.

"You're a good player, kid. Why not try it?" Mr McCarty asked. Jacob merely shrugged. Mr McCarty rolled his eyes at Jake's lack of interest. He turned to face me.

"Isabella, is it?"

"Bella", I amended shyly. A playful smirk displayed on his face.

"Bella", Mr McCarty nodded. With that, he turned and strode away. I had a strange feeling that he knew something I didn't.

"You don't like football?" I asked Jacob, turning back to face him.

"It's not exactly my thing", he dismissed.

"So what did you want to talk about, Jake?"

"Nothing...doesn't matter now", he muttered.

"If you want to –"

"You mentioned going to Port Angeles yesterday", he interrupted. It was a clear sign of changing the subject, not subtly. I decided to go along with it.

"Yeah. I need some books for biology and I don't think Forks library have them", I explained.

"Let's check out the bookstore here first", he suggested, "then we can go to Port Angeles this weekend."

**--**

I walked through the door of the small bookstore, making sure to glance around. The seemed to be deserted. It was a small shop that had opened up a couple of years ago. I had really visited it because I normally got my books straight from Port Angeles when I went shopping there.

"Hello!" a high musical female voice rung out. I turned around to see a small pixie-like woman skipping towards me. She had short spiky black hair a beautiful grey eyes. I didn't know grey could be beautiful before. She held a certain grace as she pranced towards me.

"Hi", I stammered. Where the hell was Jacob?! He was supposed to be parking the car and coming straight out.

"Oh Bella! It's _so_ nice to meet you", the lady gushed. I backtracked, wondering how the hell she knew my name.

"Eh... I don't..."

"It's ok. I'm a friend of Edward's", she said as if that explained my utter confusion.

* * *

**Muahahahahahahahahahaha iw2lu4ever :)**


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter Fourteen: Forest Dreams

**Bella's POV**

_Last chapter:_

"_Oh Bella! It's so nice to meet you", the lady gushed. I backtracked, wondering how the hell she knew my name._

"_Eh... I don't..."_

"_It's ok. I'm a friend of Edward's", she said as if that explained my utter confusion._

I stared at her, wondering how on earth she knew about Edward. I thought I was the only who didn't know about him. He did tell me not to say anything and I didn't. I only presumed that was because he didnt' want anyone else to know. Then how the hell did this person know.

I knew this lady, of course. She was married to Mr Whitlock who was a constant volunteer at Fork's local shelter. They had moved to Forks a couple of years ago at around the same time that Doctor Cullen did.

"How do you know Edward?" I asked her, curiously. I had an odd feeling when she smiled at me. The thought I had earlier about Edward going to see other people at night as he did to me returned.

Did he?

I didn't know.

Edward wasn't human and he could spend his time doing whatever he wanted. I wasn't the only girl in the world. Before me, he must've had other things to do at night.

"I'm Alice Brandon", she announced happily, practically bouncing on the spot.

"I'm...Bella", I told her, realising that she already knew. I blushed in my embarrassment. She wrinkled her nose and plastered another big smile on her face.

"So...Edward?" I asked again, uneasily.

He had kissed me.

He told me he loved me.

My stomach twisted uncomfortably as those thoughts made their way back to my head. God, please don't tell me he visited other women at night.

"Oh relax!" I jumped as the woman waved her hand in the air dismissively, "I know Edward didn't tell you about me, so I'm going to."

Crap. He did. I wasn't the one.

"Are you...are you ok?" Alice took a step forward, studying my face. I suddenly felt nauseated. Did she know he wasn't human too? Did she believe him? Did he love her?

"Bella?"

My head snapped up when Jacob walked into the small library. I ran towards him, throwing my arms around his waist as I buried my face into his chest. I felt like a weight was suddenly thrusted on my shoulders and I couldn't carry it by myself.

I remembered the last night when he had left so suddenly, ripping himself away from me without an explanation. I didn't understand at all. I thought he'd return but he didn't. I'd spent most the night, standing by my stupid window in vain hope.

He didn't come back.

Would he be back tonight?

I suddenly felt very empty as I remember our last conversation yesterday. The way Edward was trying to avoid telling me straight that he didn't want to have sex with me.

What was this woman going to tell me now?

I looked up and realised that Jacob was talking to me.

"Are you ok? What happened?" he demanded. I sighed.

"I feel sick", I muttered. Alice looked between Jacob and I, her lip between her teeth.

"Bella?" she asked, her eyes skimming over Jacob's height. "May I talk with you please?"

"Bella?" Jacob looked at me expectantly.

"Can you...look around and see if you can find any of my biology material books?" I asked him. He nodded, not before suspiciously glancing at Alice. But nevertheless walked away and disappeared behind the bookshelves.

"I'm his...sort of sister", Alice spoke as soon as Jacob was out of sight. I was surprised.

"What do you mean...'sort of' sister?" I asked her in confusion.

"We're not blood related", she explained simply.

"Oh", I didn't know how to respond to that. So she wasn't just another woman that he visited apart from me.

"About yesterday", alice started again.

"Yesterday?" I repeated. I didn't remember seeing her yesterday.

"Yeah", she confirmed with a nod, "when Edward left. He told us he didn't exactly leave you on...good terms."

"Us?" I repeated again, "good terms? Wait, he told you?"

"Us as in...his family", Alice explained slowly. I felt like I was really going to faint now. I had no idea Edward had a family. He told me that there were others like him...I didn't really know what he was exactly yet though. I didn't expect him to be related to the locals.

"Would you like to sit down?" she asked. I nodded gratefully as she stirred me to a table with a chair pulled out. I sat down, taking in a deep breath. I honestly wasn't expecting this.

"Edward doesn't want to introduce you to the family but I think he should", the woman told me, "That's why I came to see you. If you ask him, he'll bring you though."

"Er..." I didn't know that I should be wanting to meet his family. I didn't know that he'd actually want me to.

"Why did...I mean, did Edward tell you why he left yesterday?" I asked, blushing in my embarrassment.

"It's part of who he is", she spoke softly. "To protect you."

I had no idea what I meant and was about to question her before she straightened up suddenly.

Jacob reappeared, carrying a couple of thick books in his hand.

"Got a couple of them", he told me, obviously ignoring Alice who was once against raking her eyes over him. It wasn't in a perverse manner as if she was checking him out, it was in a way as if she was trying to remember him from somewhere.

"Bring them to the counter", Alice chimed, once again in her cheerful tone. Jacob looked at me in a confused expression before following the pixie towards the front desk.

--

I didn't get to speak to Alice again. I didn't want to. I had been given too much information to deal with. I felt oddly depressed as Jacob drove me home. The ride was silent as I looked out of the window and was lost in my thoughts.

Edward.

Of course my mind was filled with Edward. It was filled with the hurt I was feeling when he left me so harshly last night. It was filled with the odd surprise I had just had with the Alice woman who was supposedly his 'sort of' sister.

Somehow I didn't mind knowing that the person I was falling for wasn't human. I did mind knowing that he had a 'sort of' sister that I didn't know about. My mind worked in stupid ways.

"Bella?"

I turned to Jake and sighed.

"What did that lady want?" he asked as we got out of the car. He carried my books as I opened the door to my house.

"What lady?" I asked, trying to feign innocence. It didn't work. He simply quirked an eyebrow at me.

"Ms Brandon", he prompted.

"Do you want to come in?" I asked. Before he could answer, I pushed him indoors and closed the door. "Let's go to my room. Hey it's Friday, got any plans?"

"When do I ever have any plans on Fridays?" Jacob laughed, following me up the stairs. I laughed with him, glad that the subject was changed.

"Aren't there normally parties or something?" I asked him.

"Not that I know of. Or was invited to", he shrugged, closing my bedroom door. "You're not exactly a party girl, why go to a party?"

"Better than being bored", I pointed out, collapsing on my bed with a sigh. He jumped on next to me and we faced each other.

"I'd rather stay in with you that go to a stupid party", Jacob said rolling his eyes, "All we'll get is guys trying to hit on you and skanks trying to grope me."

"Grope you?" I teased, "Pretty sure of yourself, aren't you Black?"

He gave me a sheepish look. "It's not like it hasn't happened before."

"Wait, what?" I straightened up immediately. "You've been to parties without me?"

"Don't be ridiculous", Jake dismissed my outrage with a wave of his hand, "when do I ever do things without you? I meant at school."

It was then that I realised what he was talking about. Unlike me, if Jacob wanted to, he could be hanging out with the popular students of Forks Highschool. Jacob had the looks, he had smart, he was funny and somehow he ended up with me. I had seen plenty of times when girls had thrown themselves at him. Yet it didn't bother me then because I knew that Jacob was too good to settle for mere busty bitchy blondes.

But what if he didn't?

There was nothing stopping Jacob from ditching me as a friend. He could really have a proper girlfriend rather than spend his time with me. I was just Bella Swan. I was just the girl who hung out with Jacob Black.

Another wave of depression threw itself upon as I suddenly realised that I was pushing Jacob away. While focusing on Edward and all the baggage that came with falling in love, I was pushing away my best friend. My Jacob.

"Hey, are you ok?" he asked, waving a hand in front of my face. Jacob sat up, placing a hand under my chin to make me face him.

"I'm sorry", I whispered brokenly. Edward had left me the night before, I couldn't have Jacob leaving me too. What was the matter with me? I had been ignoring my best friend. What kind of friend was I? Jacob would never ignore me like I did to him. He'd always be there. He always was. He still is.

"For what?" he asked, searching my eyes, trying to see what I was talking about.

"For...being distant", I murmured, breaking our gaze, "I'm sorry we don't talk like we used to anymore. You're still my best friend Jake, you have to know that."

"Of course I know that", he said laughing to lighten the mood, "you can be as distant as you like Bella, I'll be here to bring you back. It pisses me off when you ignore me though but I can take it."

I knew then that I couldn't take advantage of my friendship with Jacob. He was a human being and deserved more than I was giving him. I might be falling in love with Edward, but he wasn't here right now. Jacob was.

--

Edward's POV

I had hunted with Alice and Jasper for the rest of that night until dawn. They left, heading back to the house to get ready and to keep up their human acts. I hunted for a few more hours, making sure that I wasn't as thirsty as I was before.

I stayed in the camouflage of the forest after that, just walking around at a human speed. I was trying to clear my head and it wasn't working. All I could see was the horrified and hurt face of Bella as I ripped myself away from her and disappeared without a word.

I was truly a monster.

Would she be expecting me back to her tonight? Did she want me to return?

Whilst I wanted to ask these things to Alice, I didn't. I wanted to work this out on my own and the help of my sibling didn't matter. Jasper did calm me down of course, using his ability to control emotions; he made me feel more at ease with myself. The self loathing thing was getting old. And tiresome.

And yet I couldn't stop feeling guilty.

I had spent the rest of the day in the forest to no avail to stopping me from having torturous thoughts. All I could think about was the fact that I hurt Bella. Not physically, but emotionally. I saw the way her face crumpled and fell in hurt.

_She's better off hurt emotionally than having my teeth sinking into her skin._

I pushed away that thought as I realised that the moon had come out to greet me once again. I didn't know what time it was but I was guessing a little after evening.

I ran back to the house, forcing myself to concentrate on the soft thuds my feet made on the forest floor. I was going to see Bella tonight. To apologise firstly. She didn't deserve to be left hanging like I had done to her. And secondly, to explain. To tell her everything after all.


	15. Chapter Fifteen

Chapter Fifteen: The Girl In My Dreams

Edward's POV

Previously...

_I was going to see Bella tonight. To apologise firstly. She didn't deserve to be left hanging like I had done to her. And secondly, to explain. To tell her everything after all._

--

The first thing I noticed when I got to Bella's house – my old home – was that unlike the other times I had visited her, there were two people speaking. I couldn't hear her voice at all, so I presumed she was merely doing homework or any other mundane human thing in silent.

Renee – Bella's adoptive mother – was currently arguing with a man named Charlie, whom I presumed was Bella's adoptive father.

I ignored their conversation for now, trying to focus on the one thing I was here for. I scaled up the house easily, my senses listening and pin pointing out where the two adults were. They were in the far end of the hall, bedroom door closed.

Excellent.

But Bella was sleeping.

I couldn't help the disappointment that flooded through me as I entered softly into Bella's room and my eyes landed on her sleeping form. She was curled up facing the window, the sheets wrapped securely around her small frame. I noticed how vulnerable and petite she was.

So breakable.

So beautiful.

Her face was darkened by the night yet I saw her soft skin, parted lips. Half her hair covered her forehead and sprayed out around her head. The contrast between her dark hair and her light skin was eye catching. Her fingers twitched a couple of times and her lips moved but no sound came out.

I walked towards her sleeping form, halting when my senses inhaled something unfamiliar. It was that smell again. That _boy_ had been in here. I couldn't help the jealousy that I felt. She seeked comfort in him. After I let her down.

Her breathing hitched which caught my attention. I went to stand in front of her bed, kneeling down. I felt so tempted to brush my lips against hers but I couldn't. I would never steal a kiss from Bella unless she offered it.

"No..." she whispered, pressing her head against the pillow. I watched, mesmerized, as her small hands pulled into fists. Her breathing started up rapidly as if seh was holding her breath before. A pained expression multiplied on Bella's features.

Desperate to do something, I placed my cold hands over hers. Her palms were sweaty, and hot. As gently as I could, I rubbed the back of her hand with my thumb, trying to calm her down. She was obviously dreaming of something disturbing.

"Bella", I murmured as she pulled her hand away from me.

"No...stop it", she sobbed in a broken voice.

She turned around abruptly, laying on her back and arching her chest forwards. "I don't want...stop it..no..."

"Bella", I repeated a little louder. I couldn't watch her moan in pain like that. She looked like she was being tortured. I was so tempted to wake her up. I placed my hand on hers again, shaking it slightly. I noticed how she flinched from my touch but I kept my hand on hers anyway. "Wake up...bella, please."

"Why did you..." she muttered barely audibly. Her tone changed this time. "I didn't want you to leave..."

There was no doubt that she was talking about me now.

"I'm not leaving", I told her.

"Don't", her voice was wobbly and broke on the word.

"Bella", I whispered fiercely, scared to touch her anymore.

"No!" She sat up straight, eyes wide opened and searching into the darkness. Her face turned and we stared at eachother for a couple of minutes. It was like the first time we had met. It was like she had never seen me before. Her eyebrows pulled up in confusion, then surprise.

"Edward", Bella whispered, flinging her arms around me.

Her warmth wrapped me was like magic. Strangely, something like running liquid poured down my spine and I closed my eyes to enjoy the nice feel that ran through ym body.

"You left...I didn't know if you were coming back", she spoke frantically, against my chest, "I thought you were mad at me, Edward. And then that lady said she was your sister and I thought...I thought..."

"Shush, Bella calm down", I whispered, rubbing her back. She shivered in my embrace and I pulled back but Bella held on tighter. So stubborn.

"Everything's so different with you, Edward, I don't want you to leave me", she whispered quietly.

"I'm here", I reassured her, "I'm not leaving."

She sniffed and buried her face in the crook of my neck between my shoulder blades. I stopped breathing, for precaution's sake. She smelled good even when I wasn't smeling her. It was like I could taste her in the air.

Jealousy and suspicious flooded through me as I also tasted another type of scent in the air. I was right before. That boy had definitely been in here. She smelt of him. He had his scent rubbed up all over her. The possessive monster inside fo me roared, flaring up as I tensed.

"Why did you go yesterday?" she whispered frantically, "I thought...I...did I do something? Edward? Did I say something to make you...?"

"No, you didn't", I said. The words came out harsher than I meant for them to. I was trying to calm myself down but my thoughts were on the scent that I couldn't smell. I was trying to taste it, making sure it wasn't Bella's parent's aroma. It was definitely male.

"Do...do you know someone named Alice?" Bella's voice broke through my thoughts again. My eyes snapped down to hers. She was looking up at me with a mixture of curiosity, confusion and desperation.

"Alice", I sighed to myself. What had that little _thing_ done now?

"She said she was your...sister?" Bella told me, though it came out like a question.

"in a manner of speaking, yes", I explained reluctantly. And then I realised that this was the time for me to explain everything. Literally everything. But what had Alice said to Bella? I hadn't told her ot say anything, which mean she obviously wanted to put in her two cents where it wasn't needed.

"I didn't know that", mumbled Bella quietly. She rubbed her cheek against my chest, snuggling closer. I let out a careful breath but didn't breath in. Hungry or not, I was going to be extra careful tonight.

"There's a lot of things you don't know about me Bella", I said to her, "and...I hope to tell you everything tonight. I don't keeping secrets. Not to someone I care about."

"So why did you leave?" she asked suddenly, her eyes wide.

"You'll find that out later", I hedged cautiously, "your...parents are still awake. It's only half past ten, they may come in to check on you. Maybe I should come back later –"

"No", she said quickly before I had even decided to move, "please, stay. Please."

Her attachment to me was a surprise. After I had hurt her Bella had already practically forgiven me without reason. I had done nothing yet. I hadn't explained to her why I had snatched myself away. I hadn't told her who Alice was exactly. Though even I didn't know what Alice had told Bella. I hadn't really explained to Bella anything at all. Yet she was the one holding on to me.

We moved to lay on her bed after a while, her head rested on my chest. I breathed in cautiously, facing the window as I did to let the fresh air mingle with Bella's scent. My body was screaming at me to realise how wrong this actually was. I was meant to bite my prey, not cuddle with them. It was like a human playing with his food, eventually he'd eat it.

I tensed up at that thought and Bella placed her hand on my stomach. I marvelled at the warmth of her touch as she drew invisible lines on my shirt over my skin. I could feel the heat. I loved it.

Hesitantly, I drew in a breath.

"You're blushing."

She buried her face into my chest again. Her hair sprayed around her. I looked at all the different colours, puzzled at house shiny and soft her hair looked.

"Why are you blushing?" I asked, smelling the heat and blood in the air and feeling it against my chest. Even with the shirt between her cheek and my skin, I could feel Bella's warmth.

"No reason", she mumbled quietly.

We stayed in silent for a while longer. I did not know what Bella was thinking of, naturally, yet it did not stop me from pondering what she would be feeling or thinking. She lay silently against me, tracing patterns on my clothes. She seemed at ease somehow, no mention from the dream she had had before. I decided not to ask, we had enough to talk about.

But how exactly was I to approach the subject?

She must've have many questions for me, it was natural for humans to be nosy, they investigated and observed everything around them. And I could see that Bella wanted to know. And I wanted to tell her too, yet what would happen afterwards?

Perhaps I should've gone to Alice. Perhaps Alice would've seen the vision of how Bella would react after I told her my secret. The secret of my nature. Was that why Alice went to Bella today? Did she already tell Bella everything?

No, I decided, because then surely Bella would've asked.

Bella shifted, brushing her lips against my neck. The small gesture made me shiver in content. I leaned closer so that I could kiss her. She smiled against my lips, threading her fingers through my hair. I breathed in her beautiful scent. It confused me for a while, the sweet, appealing taste that burnt my throat but made the rest of my body tingle.

She really smelt too delectable for her own good.

I hovered over her body, relishing on how soft she was underneath me. I felt like I was playing with fire by how fragile she was compared to me. were her feelings as fragile? Would she still kiss me so sweetly, so gently when she found out what I was?

"Don't hold back, Edward...please, don't", she whispered against my mouth. Bella wound her arms around my neck, pressuring me towards her face. She had no idea what she was asking, really. I had to hold back. I had to hold back everything with Bella.

I kissed her nonetheless, giving her as much as I could without giving too much at much. She sucked softly on my top lip, scratching her fingernails onto my scalp. The motion sent electricity zooming down my spine. Her heat radiated my body. As our lips parted, Bella moaned gently encouraging me to carry on. Our tongues entwined and I had to check to make sure I was still control because she was very slowly throwing my control out of the window again.

Bella wriggled under me, effectively rubbing her hips against my now very obvious erection. A small part of my mind registered that it was inappropriate to be in a girl's room at night and supporting a hard on whilst we rolled around in her bed. Another part of my mind said to enjoy it because I'd probably not be doing this against once the girl finds out I'm a bloodsucking vampire.

I left her lips, leaving Bella breathless and panting, because leaving her without air supply wasn't a good idea. My mouth followed the familiar path of her jawline, back and forth simply because she was still breathing hard and her breath hit my face. I loved it.

And I had to stop.

"Put on some jeans or trousers", I told her, pulling myself away despite the lock she had around my neck. Damn, even I was still quite breathy. "Uh...and grab a sweater too. It's cold outside."

"Are we going somewhere?" Bella asked, scrambling off the bed. I stood up, unable to stop my eyes from tracing down her form. She wore the most sinful things to bed.

Stupid pajama shorts.

Stupid almost see-through white vest top.

"Edward?"

"Mmm?"

"You're staring."

"Sorry. Here, this will do." I grabbed a pair of jeans and placed in on the bed. Bella immediately began pulling off her shorts. To avoid any awkwardness – or loss of self control, again – I turned around and raided her wardrobe for a warm jumper of some sorts.

"What about Charlie and Renee?" Bella asked after I got out a sweater top and a jacket. I didn't want her to catch a cold or anything.

"Sleeping", I confirmed. Charlie was currently in the spare room while Renee slept in the master room. It seemed the argument they were having wasn't resolved.

"Where are we going?" she asked again.

"Out. Into the forest", I said taking in a deep breath.

She bit her lip, as if trying to work out something. What I'd give to be able to read her mind.

"Are you going to tell me...what you are?" she asked, hesitantly.

Unfortunately.

"Yes", I answered. Bella nodded to herself, looking up at me with eager eyes. So pleased that I was going to tell her finally. I wondered how pleased she would be exactly _after_ she understood everything. This was the moment. The time where it would either make or break us. I really hoped it wasn't the latter.

"May I ask one question?" I asked her, as she slipped on a pair of trainers.

"Sure", she agreed distractedly.

"Why do you smell of Jacob Black?"

"I...what?"

She looked practically offended but the subject had been bugging me since I inhaled his scent. I mean, he was her best friend from what she told me but that didn't mean he had to _rub_ himself on her. Animals did that.

I wanted to do that.

"Has he been in your room today?" I asked, trying another approach. She stood up after tying her laces and pursed her lips at me.

"Yeah, after school. What do you mean, I smell of him?" Bella frowned, bending her head to sniff her shoulders. She wrinkled her nose.

"I smell fine. I smell...like me. Jacob smells of boys and...earth and sometimes sweat but I smell...fine", she muttered, sniffing herself inconpiciously again.

I begged to differ. She did have her strawberry and freesia scent but it was covered with that musty dog aroma too.

"He's touched you too much", I pointed out, knowing that I sounded quite whiny then, "that's why you smell of him."

I felt like putting up a sign on top of Bella's head.

_MINE. DO NOT TOUCH OR RUB. DANGEROUS CONSEQUENCES IF YOU DO. MINE. STAY AWAY._

"He's touched me too much?" Bella repeated looking bewildered, "sometimes, Edward, you say the sillest things."

I frowned, wondering what silly thing I had said before Bella rolled her eyes at me.

"Let's go then", she said brightly, taking me hand and leading me towards the door.

"Uh...we're gonna use my way", I interrupted her path and pointed towards the window.

"I can't jump out the window, " she squeaked, looking panicked.

"You won't be", I assured her, "I will. Now hop on."


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter sixteen: Through Me To You

**Edward's POV**

"Let's go then", she said brightly, taking me hand and leading me towards the door.

"Uh...we're gonna use my way", I interrupted her path and pointed towards the window.

"I can't jump out the window, " she squeaked, looking panicked.

"You won't be", I assured her, "I will. Now hop on."

**Bella's POV:**

My eyes widened as I realised that Edward was actually not joking. He was seriously not joking. I wanted so badly to know what his secret was and he planned to tell me after we jumped out of the window.

"But...but...but", I stammered, dreading what he was planning. Edward smirked, pushing his left hand out for me to take. I sounded like a broken record. A chicken broken record.

"A little trust, please Bella? It isn't that dark outside", Edward assured me. I took his hand but stayed rooted to my place. It seemed my feet wouldn't move.

"I'm not scared of the dark", I muttered defensively, "I'm scared of dying from falling out of my window. I don't think Renee and Charlie would appreciate that."

"I'm too selfish to let you die such a lame death", Edward chuckled darkly, "I'm too selfish to let you die at all, actually."

I rolled my eyes at his words. It wasn't like he could stop me from dying. Knowing my clumsy nature, I was surprised that I survived this long. I felt my stomach clench at that thought. My parents didn't make it, and I did.

I sighed and squeezed Edward's hand, looking up at him. He had an odd thoughtful expression on. His eyebrows furrowed in concentration. I wanted to ask him what he was thinking about so hard but decided against it.

I tried to snap him out of it instead.

"Um, Edward?"

"Yes, Bella?" his answer sounded very curt. He looked down at me and sighed, letting go of my hand that he had been holding. He reached up to my face instead, cupping my cheek. We stood at a distance, a fair space of at least more than a foot between us. When his hands trailed down my jaw, I sighed against it, a smile dancing on my lips.

"I'm scared, Bella", Edward whispered, very, very quietly. I wondered if I imagined him saying that. I tried to keep the surprise off of my face. Why would Edward ever be scared? Why would he ever be anything but beautiful?

My eyes were still closed and his fingers tickled the side of my face. I felt his thumb brush over my bottom lip, pressing against it lightly. I thought that I probably _did_ imagine him admitting his fear but then he spoke again.

"I'm scared because I've never even thought of having what we have. and now...before we even get to properly enjoy this, the technicalities and complications are going to get in the way."

There was an old sadness in his voice that made my heart squeeze uncomfortably. Surely he didn't really think that. Surely he trusted me more than to think his secret would keep me away. I was stronger than that. I loved him better than that.

"I love you", he whispered in the same sorrowed tone. I opened my eyes to look at him. His green eyes were soft not piercing, smooth and glassy. Beautiful even. His skin glowed lightly in the dark and the light of the moon outside. We stared at each other for a couple of minutes. I did not know why he looked at me but I could see his expression. I was looking to decipher his sudden sadness. I wanted to get rid of it. An angel like Edward could not be damned. He could not be so sad.

I opened my mouth to respond to what he had said, to tell him that I loved him too no matter what but before I could, he spoke.

"Get on my back", Edward said abruptly, with a sharp edge. He softened his voice, "and hold on tight. Wrap your arms around my neck and your legs around my waist. I won't let you get hurt."

"What if I slip?" I squeaked. The panic returned. I realised what a coward I was being but I couldn't help myself.

"Bella", he sighed with obvious added patience. Actually, it seemed his patience was wearing thin. "I will hold you. I won't let you get hurt. Now come on. We better get this over with. You have school tomorrow."

School. As if that was in my mind right now.

Biting my lip, I mentally scolded myself for being such a whiny little girl. Edward turned his back to me and bent down slightly. I hopped up with a short yelp and wrapped my arms around his neck like he asked.

"Ready?"

Edward braced himself by the side of the windows. My eyes widened as I looked down. The cold air hit my face, adding to the great cowardice I was becoming.

"Um...actually no. Maybe I should – _oh_!"

He sprung.

Edward literally _sprung_ from the window, away from the house and into the air. I had watched him do this loads of times before but never had I been on his back. Normally he'd hover in the air for a couple of seconds and lightly fall down before disappearing into the darkness. I never worried that he'd break his leg or anything. He was my angel. Maybe he had wings. Well, I hadn't really thought about it before.

I'd always be preoccupied by _him_ not how he got into my room.

As soon as Edward leaped into the air, the cold wind burnt my eyes. They were watering already and I felt my whole face cool down marginally. However, I did not anticipate him falling _down_ to the ground.

It was like a rush, a pummelling, terrifying rush. My stomach was up in my throat and my heart skipped a beat as we both went crashing downwards. We were only two stories up but it felt like miles. The cold wasn't helping. I squeezed my arms around Edward's neck, not even bothering to check if I was suffocating him. My legs squeezed around his waist. I bent down and pressed my face into the back of his neck. The air rushed around us and I blinked just the once.

And his feet touched the ground.

It was a soft thud, almost muted but I felt his feet land. I was frozen in my position, unable to move. Looking around, my eyes adjusted to the fence on our side garden and behind that was the forest, thick with trees.

"Bella?" Edward spoke. His voice was quiet because it was almost silence here. I could still hear the rush of air in my ears but I knew it was very quiet. It was too late for anyone to be making any noises.

"Bella? Are you OK?"

"We did it", I whispered, looking around properly now. We were on the floor. "We didn't crash. We're on the floor. We're OK."

"Your confidence in me is slightly insulting", Edward chuckled, sounding teasing. "Did you think I could fall crashing to the ground?"

"Um. Well. Uh, yes", I admitted, unashamed.

"Thanks", he muttered dryly, "would you like to get there the fast way or slow way?"

"Depending on 'there' actually is", I started, "I think the fast way is best. It's nearly midnight. You know, all you have to do is tell me what you are. There's no need to sneak me out of the house."

"It's best this way", Edward explained, sounding drained. I knew that he didn't want this to happen. He wanted me to know, but he didn't. I understood that. But my teenage impatience was getting the best of me. "I'm only taking you a little bit into the forest. A small meadow that I stumbled across. And you're wrong, Bella."

"About what?"

"I can't just tell you what I am", he sighed heavily, "there's a whole load of explaining that comes attached."

"But I –"

"Hold on tight", Edward commanded firmly. I squeezed my arms around his neck once more. I was guessing that the fast way didn't involve me from getting off of his back.

"Are you going to carry me?" I asked, genuinely curious.

"Yes. I'm running. It's the fastest way there. Ready?"

"Want an honest answer?"

Edward laughed and began running.

Everything was a blur.

My breath caught and I was frozen once more, gripping onto him as hard as I could. I swear I was hurting him by the way I was gripped to tightly to his body. The trees flew by us. Or rather, we flew by them. I hadn't even realised when Edward had jumped over our fence but all I could see was black and brown and very dark green.

I wanted to close my eyes because they were watering from the wind but I couldn't. The tears slipped down my cheeks and I couldn't stop them from rolling down. Edward was running but the way he did it, to me it felt like he was gliding. His arms were moving by his side and his legs were moving it too but the gracefulness of it was so smooth that it didn't seem that way. I stared on ahead, wondering how he could be running so fast.

How he could've jumped down a two story height house so easily. How he could move from one place to the other so fast, in the blink of an eye. How he could never age.

I was curious but I never really wanted to guess what Edward was.

He just was.

My angel.

My...lover? was it appropriate to call him that?

I loved him and he loved me, surely that's what we were. We met in secret and enjoyed eachother's presence. Eachother's touches. That's what lovers did.

Though we had never made love.

"We're here, Bella", Edward spoke softly, breaking me out of my thoughts. I was able to move this time, looking around in wonder. We were in the meadow that he had promised. The trees coated around it, keeping the inside forbidden, sort of. Kind of off limits. The inside was illuminated by the moonlight which shone lightly on the soft grass that grew richly to floor the ground. A few flowers, of different colours were scattered to grow around the meadow, here and there. It looked to be peaceful, undisturbed mostly.

Edward bent down and I stumbled off, my mouth opened and awe and I walked into the meadow. He followed behind me, I didn't look but somehow I felt him. I looked around still, absorbing the beauty of everything.

After a couple of minutes, I turned around to talk.

"Edward, this great. I really ..."

My voice trailed off as I noticed his expression.

It was pain.

It was sorrow.

It was regret and shame.

"Do you want to sit down?" he asked me. I nodded and folded my legs clumsily. Edward walked a few steps and folded down too so that he was sitting a meter away from me. he took in a deep breath.

I could hear my heart beat, thrashing against my ribcage in the silence. I did not like it.

_Get it over with_, I wanted to tell him, _I'll still love you the same, Edward. Just tell me._

"I was born in Chicago", Edward spoke finally, "in 1901. June the twentieth."

He stopped, too soon, to let me soak that in.

1901...

_1901_?

"I was human then. I died on the 15th of October 1920, at the age of 19", he carried on, "this is the age I am now. And forever will be. Nineteen years old forever.

The reason...the reason I am here though I am dead is because I was..._changed_. The Spanish epidemic hit Chicago and I was about to die but then...someone changed me. Transformed me so that I would live on. Though, not live per say, since I'd be dead.

I'm cold because I'm dead. My heart does not beat because I'm dead. I can run fast and have other...powers because I am not human anymore. I was changed, Bella. I'm different."

And he stopped. He looked down at the grass, staring as his hands which were picking at the little fickles. I looked down too, watching him as he did so. His words did went through and sunk in. I didn't say that I wouldn't believe him. I did not say that I would not understand because I knew that I did. I knew that I could. Everything was different.

And now he had told me everything.

With one exception.

Edward told me that he had changed, but he did not tell me what he had changed _into_.

"I drink blood to survive."

But he did not need to tell me.

"I hunt, Bella. I've killed people before."

Because I could find that my mind was already working things out.

"I've chosen to not kill people and drink their blood. I hunt animals instead now."

I was already piecing everything together now.

"But blood is blood."

Every little detail.

"Human blood especially."

Every single word.

"Your blood is particularly appealing."

Everything he was saying.

"Every moment I am with you. It's a risk of me killing you. Of draining you dry without a thought to stop."

Everything was coming together.

"What am I, Bella?"

And then I got it. I finally understood why Edward was so hesitant about telling me. I knew then why he was close one minute and was distant another. I knew why he looked so hungry sometimes when his eyes rested over my skin.

He was a monster.


	17. Chapter Seventeen

Chapter Seventeen: The Shock Distils Me

**Edward's POV:**

I could see the way her eyes changed. I could hear her small gasps, pulling out of her lungs. Her eyes widened and her hands started to shake. I could hear the cracks as my heart broke.

Her heart was pounding against her ribcage, threatening to burst out and run away. The blood rushing through her veins called out to me yet my thirst did nothing. The burn was there but it wasn't as bad as what I was seeing.

Her facial expression screamed out fear. Bella was afraid of me. There was never a time that I had ever wanted her to be too comfortable with me but I had never wanted her to be afraid either. She had worked it out. My explanation was done. I had done all I could and now it was up to her. She would either accept me as I was or reject me.

Would I let her go?

Would I be able to move on?

Surely, I could. If Bella did not want me I could move on. I was a vampire, one of the strongest predators if not _the_ strongest of them all. I could take on anything, for my strength was unexplainable. My speed was unmatched by anything else of this world. My powers of mind reading gave me an advantage – that I didn't really need yet it helped me all the same.

I could leave Isabella Swan.

I had managed decades without her before, hadn't I? Wondering the world held its advantages too. I would be free with no responsibility. Esme would be saddened but I'd visit her every decade or so. I had never needed a family before and I did not need the rest of the Cullens.

I did not need a companion.

I did not need Bella.

_Lies!_ The inner me screamed as it tore apart. _What is vampire strength if a mere human girl can break you down?_

_What is speed if you only ever want to chase after _her_?_

_What is mind reading if her thoughts are forbidden to you?_

What is being a powerful vampire if the love of one _girl_ can destroy my spirit?

Those treacherous thoughts were horrid. Never had I ever wanted something so badly that my selfishness would show so much. If Bella wanted me to leave, I wouldn't.

No, I _couldn't_.

The need that I had for her was much too strong for me to turn away. She had admitted her love for me. Surely my confession wouldn't scare her. Surely she'd be stronger than that?

Please?

"What am I, Bella?" I asked her, repeating my question from before. Her brown eyes bore into mine, searching frantically. What was she looking for? Maybe a chance that I may be lying to her. Did she believe me?

Did it matter?

And then, after what seemed like centuries, she began to stand up.

I sat in my position, resisting the urge to reach over and grab her to me. The need to hold on and beg her to not leave me.

The reason we had come to the forest was because of one of my many insecurities. If Bella took it the wrong way, I did not want her running to her adoptive father screaming about vampires in her room. I only hoped she would keep quiet.

Her legs were shaking and she took a step back, inching further away from me. One trembling hand smacked on her opened mouth. Her breathing was coming out in deep yet quick gasps.

_No..._

"B..but you're an angel", she whispered, closing her eyes. She shook her head and took in another shaky breath. I looked up at her, begging with my eyes for her not to run away.

_Because I'd go after her_.

"I was never an angel, Bella", I said quietly. She opened her eyes and I noticed how the warm chocolatey swirls were brimmed with water. Her fear showed more than any emotion, her shock and surprise made her look so innocent.

"You're...you're vampire", she said, louder this time yet still in an undertone. She did not ask, she stated it to me. I nodded for confirmation.

"You're not human", she carried on.

I said nothing again but did not nod either for she already knew this information. Bella blinked a couple of times and straightened her posture. She took in a large gulp of air greedily and ran her fingers through her hair.

"That's why you only come to me at night?" she asked. Bella crossed her arms over her chest, giving me an oddly stern look. I stayed in my position on the grass, sitting Indian style with my legs crossed as I tried to figure out what was going on in her mind.

"I come to you at night because you are not there during the day", I explained briefly. She nodded slowly, her eyes breaking out locked gaze as she looked around us.

"Now...now I know why you didn't tell me before", she said, still looking away from me. she sighed before carrying on. "I'm not going to pretend that this doesn't...shock me Edward, because it really does. Hell, I've never actually been in love with a vampire before so..."

She trailed off and turned around, walking away from me.

At first I thought she was going to head back home, I was fighting the urge to go after her. But then she merely reached the edge of the meadow and walked back towards me. Her heart beat had gone back to normal. She wasn't shaking. She wasn't in shock.

Bella looked angry.

"You could've told me before though", she snapped suddenly as she walked back. She stared at me, flushed with her blood blazing on her cheeks and neck. "I mean, I get that it's not a normal thing to say...but...honestly Edward! You let me get so..._into_ you. You let me fall _in love _with you. You let me share myself with you and _then_ you tell me that you're a bloodsucking _vampire_!"

I opened my mouth to protest my utter confusion but Bella was still talking. She stalked over to me, stumbling on nothing a couple of times as she reached me. Then, once again to my surprise and confusion, she dropped to her knees a couple of inches away from my face.

And heaven help me she looked _pissed off_.

"You don't _seem_ like a vampire so obviously I would never have guessed", she panted. Her tone was accusing. "All this time...I never thought you'd be _of all things_ a vampire! You didn't exactly give me a clue, did you?

"I mean, you said you weren't human. You said you weren't an angel but...but a vampire, Edward? Honestly...seriously? I love you... why didn't you tell me? Why did you let me get so involved with you?"

Bella's speech turned quieter and hesitant towards the end. Her eyes were watering again, threatening to overload and pool out. Her lips were firmly shut but pulled out in some sort of pout that looked too appealing to me in a situation like this.

And then it dawned on me, what Bella had just said. Whether she realised it or not Bella had jus admitted the fact that she truly did love me.

_Multiple times_.

And that was the only thing I could think of to say now back to her.

"I'm in love with you too", I whispered, pushing my head forwards so that our foreheads were touching. She did not flinch. She did not move back. Instead she continued to stare into my ways the way I was staring at her.

The way she was so warm, even out here in the cold, made her heat radiate off of her. I closed my eyes and enjoyed the warmth that she brought. The security. Even amongst the worse of fears, Bella had still managed to stay close to me.

"But you're a vampire, Edward. How could you be in love with..._me_?" she whispered, her breath hitting my face.

My confusion must have shown brightly on my facial expression because Bella elaborate on her question.

"A _vampire_, Edward", she emphasised, "and I'm _human_. We can never be together... we can _never_ belong. And you knew that all along yet you let me fall for you anyway."

"We do belong", I told her fiercely, "and I know what I am and I know what you are. It makes no difference to me. I love you the same. So...does it matter, for you?"

She paused before breathing in and pulling back. Her hands landed on my shoulders but Bella looked away, a far away expression on her face.

"Yes. It does."

I tried to work out what that meant and by the time Bella turned back to face me again I felt the little bit of hope I was clinging onto fade away. Just like that. She looked at me warily, not in fear – I realised.

And it wasn't fear from before. It was pure shock. It was...betrayal. She felt betrayed that I did not tell her what I was.

But couldn't she understand that it was never that easy? I didn't care whether she was human. I would keep that fact and understood what it meant but I didn't care. I loved her no less even if she was a mere mortal. To me, she was still Bella.

"What do we do now?" I asked her, swallowing hard. I did not want to know the answer.

"Take me home", she whispered in a tired voice.


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter Eighteen: Selfish Reasons

**Edward's POV**

_Last Chapter:_

"_What do we do now?" I asked her, swallowing hard. I did not want to know the answer._

"_Take me home", she whispered in a tired voice._

Bella stood up, avoiding my gaze. I tried to look into her eyes. I wanted to see what she was feeling. I couldn't read her mind but surely I'd be able to read her emotions. Yet it was no luck. She was closing herself off from me.

I didn't like it.

I didn't understand.

I've always hated feeling helpless. As a vampire, I had everything I ever wanted. No one could challenge. No human at least. And the helplessness I felt with Bella made me feel frustrated if nothing else. I could never force her to feel anything. I could never force her to think anything.

My immortality, my strength, my powers were useless when it came to Bella. It did nothing for me. I was truly powerless and mundane when it came to her.

"Hold on tight", I said quietly in a strained voice as she secured her arms around my neck. I ran back towards her house, going as slow as I could but so that she wouldn't notice. I didn't want to return her back home. I wanted to stay here and talk. I didn't like this. I didn't understand.

I scaled up the house easily, noiselessly. I focused on Bella's slow breaths, she was controlling her breathing. Her heartbeat was normal which was odd for a human considering what had just happened.

As soon as I set her feet into her bedroom, she began stripping off her clothes. I watched shamelessly until she climbed into her bed with her sleeping shorts and vest top, pulling the bed sheet covered over her slim form. She shivered.

Her head hit the pillow but her eyes were fixed at me. I walked over to close the window, not knowing whether I should leave or not. I closed it and she did not protest so I stayed. Bella continued to look up at me.

The air was filled with her scent. Her beautiful, mouth watering fragrance that burnt my throat slightly. Outside in the open it was fine because the wind blew the smell away but in such a closed space...

"Edward?" she whispered. My attention was to her immediately.

"Yes, Bella?"

"I'm sorry", she said quietly. She yawned once and rolled over to her side, her eyes drooping slightly but her gaze still looking at me. I stood rooted on my spot wondering what the apology was for. By the time I had decided to reply, she was already asleep.

--

I had time to think when she was sleeping. I could think of nothing but her of course. Nothing but her response to me. I suppose I was happy that she didn't go running and screaming. I should've been happy that she didn't reject me.

Did she?

I. Did. _Not_. Understand.

Was that what her apology was for? Because she changed her mind about us? She did not want it anymore? What did it mean?

I knew that her reaction wasn't exactly welcoming but she didn't push me away. She was angry, sure. That was understandable. She felt betrayed, once again it was too understandable. But why did she seem reluctant?

And when I had asked her... I asked her if our difference mattered.

Her answer hurt me.

She rendered me helpless with nothing but a few words. She left me in such confusion when nothing but her reaction. Surely someone so powerless couldn't control me so.

Bella mumbled something incoherent, curling her body upwards and burying her head further into the pillow.

She reeked of goodness.

Of beauty.

And I wanted _nothing_ but her.

And her acceptance.

But Bella did not accept me. The fact that I was a vampire mattered. She didn't want to continue a courtship with a vampire. Who would? She deserved better than me. she deserved a _normal_ relationship. Perhaps that Jacob boy. He was normal. He was...sane. he wasn't dangerous at all.

Was that what she wanted?

The perfect mundane life?

She would, in a few years time, walk up the isle and the lucky man smiling at her would be human. He'd have a soul. He wouldn't be me. The man she'd give her everything to. Her permission. She deserved the chance to carry his firstborn child.

Did Bella want to be normal?

Was it my choice to take that away from her?

Would I? _Yes_.

The self hate and loathing would be there but the choice had been made long, long ago. It was since the first night I saw her in all her beauty. It was her choice really. She was the one to approach me. she touched me first. Therefore she made the choice.

The choice that I wouldn't let her go.

She deserved better but I didn't care.

I was too selfish to care anyway.

I would covet. I had already broken half the commandments.

_Since I was going to hell..._

And Bella was the prize. She was what I wanted. I was a vampire, she was human. She thought that fact mattered. I did not.

I got up from my place in Bella's room, turning towards the window and pushing it opened as quietly as I could. Her scent was getting to me and I couldn't help the pain that scorched through my throat. I leaped out into the night with my mind made up.

_...I might as well do it thoroughly_.

I'm not letting go, Bella.

_**Bella's POV**_

The sound that interrupted my dreamless state was unwelcomed. I didn't like it. My hand came out from underneath the bed sheet and smacked the offending object.

"OUCH!"

I sat up, cradling my hand against my chest as the tears of pain spilt over. I sniffed wincing at the pain of my now red, throbbing fingers.

Alarm clocks weren't soft.

"Bella?"

"Stupid girl", I hissed at myself. What was the matter with me? Why on earth did I think whacking the clock would stop the noise?

Oh right. It was still ringing. I reached over and switched it off before inspecting my two forefingers.

"Bella, honey?" Renee called out. Her voice sounded through the locked door along with two timid knocks.

I scrambled out of the bed, padding over to unlock the door.

"What happened?" she cooed, immediately noticing my injured hand. I winced as she prodded it.

"Unfortunate accident with the alarm clock", I informed her, sighing.

And then...

"Edward?" my head snapped up as the name slipped out of my lips.

"Mmm? Who?" Renee looked at me suspiciously. I whirled around, my eyes searching my room to the spot just before my bed when he stood the last time I saw him.

He wasn't there. Of course.

"Bella?" Renee shook my shoulders slightly. She peeked past my shoulders, her eyes narrowed in suspicion as she looked around, copying my movements.

"I...I just thought I heard something", I mumbled, the lie was obvious even to me. Renee smirked and bought it anyway.

"Ice", she told me.

"Huh?"

"Your hand. I don't think it's broken but it needs ice or it'll swell", she explained, rolling her eyes when I winced at the pain once more.

--

I suppose I was expecting Edward to be sitting at the edge of my bed when I awoke. Maybe he would've stopped me from fracturing two of my fingers...

Sighing, I rolled my eyes at my own behaviour. It wasn't like I had asked him to stay. I should've. Yesterday was nothing of what I expected. It was actually just the opposite. I was disappointed.

The way I felt couldn't be explained because of the roll of emotions that made me feel so... betrayed. He knew...all along he knew what we were getting ourselves into and yet he let out dig into it deeper.

I mean, the fact that he was a vampire didn't matter to me. well...yeah, it did. It mattered that we would never belong. It mattered to me because I wanted us to. I wanted to keep him. I had never fallen before, and now...I fell hard and it turns out I fell for the wrong person.

--

"What happened?" Jacob demanded, taking my hand into his gently as soon as I walked over to him.

I sighed. "Fractured fingers. Bashed it against the alarm clock."

"Oh no. Is the alarm clock ok?" he teased, gently rubbing his hand over the bandaged fingers. I poked him with my good fingers.

"Who knew alarm clocks weren't soft?" I mumbled as we walked to class. He let my hand dropped and wrapped an arm around my shoulders, kissing my forehead once.

"I'll protect you from the alarm clocks, babe."

"Gee thanks."

We walked in silence, my thoughts trying to focus on the pain of my hand and succeeding. Jacob occasionally poked my face, asking if I was OK. I smiled at him, grateful to have such a nosy and perspective friend and told him that I was fine.

I wondered if Edward and I were fine.

When school ended, I was surprised to see Renee's outside of the school. She waved from me discreetly.

"You're not riding me today?" Jacob asked, frowning.

"Riding you?" I repeated incredulously. He laughed, ruffling my hair.

"I meant riding with me", he corrected. i narrowed my eyes at him.

"Sure, sure", I muttered, walking towards Renee's car. She got out and smiled at Jacob.

"Hey Renee."

"How're you Jake?" she asked, reaching over to check my hand at the same time. I let her inspect it, knowing that she had no idea what she was doing anyway. I liked to humour Renee from time to time.

"Fine thanks. You picking up Bella?" Jacob asked. She nodded.

"We've got...things to talk about", she said, turning to face me. I frowned at her, wondering what on earth she meant. She merely smiled, giving me a meaningful look and turned to go back into the car.

"See you later then", Jacob muttered, obviously put off.

"Yeah. Bye Jake", I sighed.

When I got into the car, Renee had the radio on with the volume really loud so I presumed that meant we weren't going to talk in the car. Man Who Can't Be Move by The Script was playing she was sang along, swaying here and there. She smiled at me a few times to show that I wasn't in trouble yet I couldn't help but be apprehensive.

We got out in silence.

She opened the house door and ushered me in.

"So what are we –?"

"Why don't you go upstairs and get changed? I'll make us a cup of hot chocolate and be right up", Renee interrupted me.

My eyes widened in surprise.

Hot chocolate?

The only time we ever had hot chocolate together was when she had to talk to me about boys. I bit my lip, nodding and scrambling up the stairs as fast as I could. Surely it couldn't be about this morning. I mean, I was only looking into my own room. She couldn't have caught on that I was looking for...

I mean, she didn't even know about Edward.

As long as Renee was concerned, I wasn't into the boys faze yet. My best friend was a boy for Christ sake. Or did she think..?

Did Renee perhaps want to talk to me about Jacob? Maybe she thought we were more than just friends.

I got changed and sat on my bed, looking back at the closed window and sighing.

"You decent?" Renee called out.

"Yeah", I answered, opening the door.

What surprised me was that she didn't come into my room with two hot chocolates. She came into my room holding a massive bouquet of white roses. Renee set them on my desk before turning to grin at me mischievously. She waved a tag in my face.

"Who's Edward Cullen?"


	19. Chapter Nineteen

**Chapter nineteen: Too Much To Handle**

_Renee came into my room holding a massive bouquet of white roses. She set them on my desk before turning to grin at me mischievously. She waved a tag in my face._

"_Who's Edward Cullen?"_

"Edward _who_?" I squeaked in surprise. Renee grinned, walking over to me and showing me the piece of paper which had been previously tagged with the large bouquet. My mind was whirling in a million questions and confusion.

With shaky hands, I took the piece of paper which was lilac and decorated with faded pink flowers on the background. The perfect calligraphy handwriting caught my attention.

_**Bella,**_

_**These were from the meadow. They reminded me of you for some reason, so I hope you like them. I'll see you at school on Monday, if not before.**_

_**Edward Cullen**_

"Huh?" I squeaked once more after reading it for the tenth time. Cullen? Where had I heard that name before? Edward didn't tell me his last name. I didn't remember him mentioning being called Edward Cullen. Actually, now that I think about it, he never did tell me his last name. Did vampires even have last names?

Renee lounged back on my bed, playing with the flower petals as I stood in the middle of my room holding that piece of paper. Confusion was _such_ a bitch.

All I could think about now was..._what??!_

What on earth was he thinking?

Sending me _flowers_?

I looked up and my eyesight caught attention of the large bouquet. The flowers were beautiful, I couldn't deny that. They were white and soft looking with a pink tint at the edge of their petals. The creamy colour begged to be stroked. All the thorns, I noticed, had been taken out. The stems were rough but with no thorns.

No doubt Edward knew I would've automatically scratched myself and those around me with such a weapon as a rose thorn.

"So...?" Renee drawled, grinning brightly at me.

"Uh..." I laughed nervously, looking around the room. Maybe Edward would magically appear and whisk me away?

Then again, maybe not.

But what on earth was he thinking? Surely being a vampire was something he did _not_ want my adoptive parents to know. If anything, Charlie would get out his gun immediately. Renee would... well, after she'd swoon at the sight of Edward I did not know what she'd do.

He told me not to say anything though. I was to keep quiet, wasn't i? When I was contemplating whether to tell Jacob or not, he had made me mind up for me. although then I thought he was an angel...

"Bella!" Renee was suddenly in my face, shaking my shoulder. I screamed and jumped back. She screamed and stumbled backwards, collapsing onto my bed.

"Oh I'm sorry. Are you ok?" I asked quickly, hurrying over to check if I didn't deafen her with my screams. She sat up laughing and ushering me away. I rolled my eyes at her. Somehow she always seemed to act like she was the teen and I was the adult around here. "Renee! This isn't funny."

"Of course it is. Why on earth did you scream so loudly?" she asked between laughs. I turned my attention away from her and towards the large bouquet that lay on my pillows. There were at least two dozen white roses. It was all tied together with a dark blue silky ribbon.

"So you've got an admirer then", Renee's voice interrupted my thoughts.

I felt my skin heat up from the blush.

"I've never heard of this Edward Cullen before", she mused, obviously knowing the source of my flushing state. "He goes to your school? Maybe I should pick you up from school on Monday as well..."

I let her ramble on whilst I read over the tag again and again. I traced the lines of his handwriting, assuming that he was the one to write this. Then my hand halted over one line.

_I'll see you at school on Monday, if not before._

"At school?" I squeaked once more, dropping the tag. It drifted to the floor whilst I stood rooted to my spot.

He was going to come to my school? During the day? My eyes widened in absolute horrified surprise. Maybe he made a mistake whilst writing this. He couldn't come out during the day. Even though it wasn't exactly sunny in Forks, vampires slept didn't they?

Did he sleep?

Why was there so much of Edward that I did not know of?

And now, he was gone again. After that stupid talk we had yesterday, we hadn't even established where we stood. It wasn't right. We didn't get to talk properly.

I couldn't help but feel so sad after he told me. Sad because him being a vampire meant we weren't meant to be. Betrayed because he knew. He had known all along and I didn't. I told him I didn't and that was my fault but still. The betrayed feeling was still there. And lastly sorry; because we would never be what I wanted us to be.

I told him I was sorry, which was the last thing I had said to Edward the previous night. That I was sorry we could never be.

_**Edward's POV**_

When I left her house on Thursday, my determined decisions led me to Alice. I ran to the Cullen households, something I did not expect myself to do. She was waiting for me naturally, sitting on the front porch steps with a red rose in her hand. She looked up when I slowed my sprint as I arrived closer to her.

_I see you leaving us_ she thought. Her eyes reflected sadness and I immediately felt guilty. I could see that she was hiding something in her thoughts but I let her privacy be.

"Don't leave us", Alice whispered. Her eyes broke away from my gaze and she took the rose in her hands and gave it to me. I held it; the delicate flower seemed tiny in my hand.

"I have no intentions of leaving Forks", I explained to her, "so I don't understand why you think I'm leaving, Alice."

"Edward?" Esme's whisper could be heard from inside the house. _You're leaving? When is this? What did Alice see?_

She was the only one in the house. I did not know where the others were but I presumed they were hunting since it was only around 4am and their daily jobs and requirements weren't needed until the sun rose at least.

"I don't know", I told Esme truthfully. Alice looked up at me in questioning. "Esme wants to know when I'm leaving."

"You haven't decided yet", Alice said softly. I could hear the soft flitting as Esme rand gracefully through the house. A second later, the door opened and she walked out at a human's pace towards me.

"What about Bella? Surely, I thought you'd stay for her", Esme said. I could see the desperation in her voice and I wanted nothing more than to comfort her.

"I am staying", I insisted, almost frustrated now. Of course I was staying. I had made my mind up earlier. This was Bella. I could not _leave_. That wasn't even an option. She was mine now. Mine to keep. Mine to protect and take care of. She said she loved. So what if she was confused? I wasn't. So what if she thought me being a vampire was a problem? I didn't.

I wanted her. She said she wanted me.

"You told Bella earlier", Alice said, though it was more for the benefit of Esme.

"Rosalie wouldn't be pleased", Esme sighed, shaking her head. _I don't want any argement in this family. We've got enough conflicts already._

"Never mind Rosalie", Alice and I grumbled at the same time. Esme looked surprised.

"Of course I don't mind you telling Bella", Esme explained softly, "she seems good for you, Edward." _I just don't like it when we argue._ "Rosalie will get over it. What did Bella say?"

"I don't know", I sighed.

"She feels betrayed", Alice said at the same time.

"Betrayed by you?" Esme asked.

"Betrayed that you knew and she didn't", Alice told me.

"She didn't want to know anyway", I said defensively. Alice stood up, taking the flower from my hand and passing it to Esme. "Bella said she didn't care. She said she wouldn't. Why does it bother her so much that I am a vampire? I love her the same. She said she did too. I...I don't...she wasn't making much sense anyway."

"Put yourself in her shoes Edward", Esme told me. _You're probably the first person she's fallen in love with. And now she's discovered that you're not even human. She _does_ love you, but maybe she has her doubts that you don't._

"How could she doubt something like that?" I was even more frustrated now. Alice placed a hand on my shoulder.

_Remember the determination to stay, Edward. _She looked at me meaningfully; _we don't want you to go. I don't think Bella does either. Stop wondering whether her life would be better without you. Because your life _wouldn't_ be._

I sighed. "I know."

"Give her this", Alice said taking the flower and placing it in my hand once more. She smiled up at me. "In your own way, of course."

"You'll do the right thing Edward", Esme murmured, placing her arms around me. She hugged me briefly before reaching up to stroke my hair gently. "Alice has it all covered anyway."

"What do you mean?" I asked, suspiciously. At that precise moment, Alice bounded up. Her thoughts were suddenly revealed. She hadn't been hiding a vision from me like I had feared, she was hiding something else.

"Forks' highschool?" I said her thoughts aloud. She grinned at me.

"This way you'll be closer to Bella", Alice explained, yet I was still confused.

"I'll be teaching at her school?"

"No", she laughed, shaking her head. The motion made her hair spray around her head. _You'll be attending Forks' highschool. Isn't that great? Don't you think Bella will be excited?_

"Highschool?" I repeated, horrified, "surely...Alice, surely you haven't. "

"I enrolled you yesterday", she told me as a matter of fact, "Esme helped."

"Well, Alice convinced to", Esme laughed nervously. _This way you'll see Emmett and Rosalie often too._

"Yes because I really want to see more of Rosalie, don't I?" I muttered sarcastically.

Esme scowled at me. _Don't be mean, Edward. Alice and I were merely thinking that it would help you with Bella. Instead of only seeing her at night, you can see her during the day as well._

"You start on Monday", Alice said nodding frantically, "senior year. Esme's your adoptive mother and you're enrolled in as Edward Cullen so Carlisle is your adoptive father. Isn't that brilliant? Isn't that great?"

"And what if Bella doesn't want me there?" I asked, though it hurt me to say. Esme's smile faltered. She had obviously not thought of this complication.

"Of course she does", Alice continued to nod profusely. Sometimes I wondered if her head would fly off if she kept moving it up and down that fast. "You were going to enrol anyway, I only sped things up a little."

"Thank you", I spoke through gritted teeth.

Highschool.

How nice.

And so the sun rose. It was hidden behind the merciless dark clouds so no human eyes could see the brilliancy of its shine. Yet there it was. No matter what happened between Bella and I, the sun would rise; the sun would set.

--

Alice went back into the house to get ready for her volunteer work which was at the shelter house today. Jasper and Carlisle returned, acknowledging me with a nod and their sympathy thoughts. Esme sat with me outside as we watched the sun rise over the trees.

Her thoughts weren't revolving around her pity for me which I was grateful for. Rosalie and Emmett returned from their hunting trip and I blocked them out as much as I could. The happy – horny – couple didn't do me much good with their lustful thoughts for each other.

"Back your old brooding self, I see", Rosalie commented to me as she headed towards the garage.

"That wasn't necessary", Esme murmured warningly, knowing she could hear.

"Edward's starting Forks' highschool on Monday", Alice announced suddenly. There was a small two second silent of which everyone in the household stopped what they were doing. And then the cackling began.

"Edward is...what?" Rosalie laughed.

"As in...student?" Emmett asked, curiously, "seriously Edward?"

"Alice enrolled me", I muttered, desperately ignoring Rosalie's obnoxious laughter. Her taunting wasn't very mature. I stood up, taking in a deep breath and looked towards the trees.

"I'm going for a run", I told Esme, "I'll be back later."

I enclosed the red rose in Esme's opened palm before taking off at a sprint into the covers of the trees.

A couple of minutes later I found myself in the meadow. The same meadow that Bella had heard my secret. She did not reject me. Yet, she did not accept me.

Then I remembered what Alice had said when she placed the rose in my hand. _Give her this, in your own way of course_.

I smiled softly at the thought of Bella. She wanted normal. I would give her normal. I would her anything and everything. As long as she stayed by my side.

If she deserved a normal relationship, she would get it. I would never be the mundane partner but I could try. I would give her the normal experience. I would go to school with her. The whole courting shenanigan could be taken care of. I would introduce her to my family – maybe send Rosalie on a hunting trip when that time came – and I would show Bella exactly how much my love extended for her.


	20. Chapter 20

Chapter Twenty: The Dedication

It was Friday night when I saw Bella again. She was waiting up for me, I realised by the sound of her breathing. It was late, so I expected her to be asleep yet I found myself happier to find out that she was actually waiting for me.

Did she get the flowers?

Did she like them?

Would she mind that I would be coming to her school on Monday?

Did it matter to me?

Yes it did. It mattered yet not to the extent that I would stop. I had done the right thing for too long, this time I wanted to do the selfish thing. I was going to get what I wanted. And I wanted _her_.

--

I did not enter her room; instead I let my feet fall on the inside as I sat on her window. The breeze blew in and though I did not feel it, I knew it was cold. Bella sat in the middle of her bed, like the many times I had seen her, wearing sweats this time, which I presumed was because she was cold. Yet she had not closed the window. The sweats were blue and immediately, I remembered a vision Alice had shown me before.

I shook the thought of out my mind and decided not to think about Alice right now. My thoughts were on Bella only.

She held the white roses I had sent over in both her hands, cradling it slightly.

So she had received them.

She did not look up at me, though I knew she had acknowledged my presence. Very slowly, deliberately, Bella picked out one of the roses from the bouquet of many and set the others to the side.

"He loves me", she whispered, pulling at a flower petal. It tugged off and she placed it on her palm before blowing it to the side. The petal floated to the floor.

"He loves me not." Another petal was pulled off and fell to the floor.

I frowned in my confusion but I did not interrupt whatever she was doing. Her scent was bullying me too much. The burn in my throat hissed out and I stopped breathing, just to stop the pain. Although I had hunted before, during the day, a room full of Bella and nothing but the scent of Bella did not do a vampire any good.

When I focused back to her, I realised that she was still plucking away at the petals, whispering softly under her breath. When she had reached the last two petals, I finally realised what she was doing.

"He loves me not..."

The petal floated to the ground.

"He loves me", she whispered, taking the last petal and placing it in her palm. Instead of blowing it away like she did with the others, she closed her hand firmly and finally looked up at me.

"You were debating my affections for you using the petals of a rose flower?" I asked her, the words coming out harsher than I intended. She bit her bottom lip, at least having the decency to look sheepish about it.

"You sent them, Edward."

"So you doubt my love for you?" I demanded her, finally moving from my place. How many times did I have to tell this stupidly beautiful girl how much I truly loved her? Did she not know that the way I felt had never been felt before? And that it would never change? Not even if I wanted it to.

How many times did I have to tell her?

How many times _would_ I have to tell her?

As many times as she wanted to hear it...

"How can I _not_ doubt it?" Bella whispered, bringing her knees to her chest. She took in a deep breath. "Can vampires even love? Is that possible...for your kind?"

My kind...

"Yes", I said curtly, my patience wearing thin. "I'm pretty sure the fact of my affections is the reason that I haven't sunken my teeth into one of your veins and drained your body dry of blood. The fact that I've fallen in love with you is the reason why I would never, ever do anything to harm you, Bella."

Her brown, doe eyes were glassy and I reached out to her, sitting on the side of the bed. Hesitantly, the back of my right hand brushed against her cheeks. A beautiful rosy colour painted up her neck and I inhaled slowly. Her scent was beautiful.

Painful, but always worth it.

"I warned you", I began softly, "did I not warn you before that I was not what you thought I was? Did I not tell you what you were getting yourself into, Bella? Are you mad at me for being who I am?"

"No", she whispered, shaking her head furiously, "no, Edward. I'm not mad. I promise, I'm not mad. I'm just...I don't understand, Edward."

A crystal, salty tear slipped from the corner of her eyes and trailed down her cheek. I caught it halfway on her skin and brushed it away. Bella moved her hand from around her knees and stretched out her legs. She cupped my hands into hers, moving it so that my thumb was gently brushing against her lips. The rose petal was released.

"I don't understand", she whispered, in a strained voice.

"You don't need to", I told her, leaning my forehead against hers. I loved how my fingers were slowly trailing all over her face, guided by herself. She moved closer and placed her head on my shoulder. I gathered her in my arms, holding her securely against me.

I should be doing this everyday.

Just holding her, just touching her and knowing that she was mine; it brought the most relief I had ever had in my entire years of being a vampire.

"I love you Bella and you love me to", I whispered. She did not correct me so I carried on. "I _can_ love, and I do love. Never doubt that, because that's all you need to understand. And I don't care if you're a human. It matters not if I'm a vampire; I'm yours...will you be mine, Bella? Mine and no one else's?"

She looked up at me, her lips parted. Without waiting for an answer, I leaned forwards – unable to stop myself – and just lightly pressed my lips against hers. She inhaled against my lips softly before pushing forwards to deepen the kiss.

Her hands and fingers were in my hair, holding me closer, bringing me closer so that our lips would never separate again. My eyes were squeezed shut as I moaned into her mouth, placing my hands on her waist as she pulled herself to her knees. Her chest was soft and warm compared to my cold and hard body.

She was the complete opposite of me yet I knew there and then that no other had ever been as compatible as Bella and I were. We fit perfectly. Her warmth for my coldness. Her soft skin for my impenetrable hard skin. Her small feminine figure for my large masculinity.

We broke apart, though I wanted to do nothing of the sort, for the sake of breathing. I didn't need the air and my lips never left her skin for that matter, licking and tasting the deliciousness that made my throat burn so much.

Bella was breathless, whispering my name and brushing her lips against my ears as I kissed down her neck and on her collarbone. She moved so that her knees were on either side of my lap and she was straddling me. Her fingers ran through my hair gently as she rested her chin on my shoulder. I brought my lips to her cheek and inhaled her scent slowly.

The burn was painful, but her fragrance was the perfect distraction from that.

"I want to", Bella whispered, her voice shaking, "I want to be yours, Edward. But how do...Edward, I've never been...obviously not with a vampire before. I don't want to screw up."

"It's okay to screw up", I told her, slightly trying to convince myself in the process, "you just learn from the mistakes."

"I've already screwed up", she disagreed, speaking quickly. "You tell me what you are and I immediately presume the worst for us."

"Then don't be so quick to doubt me in the future", I whispered gently. "I want nothing but to be with you. Complications do not matter, Bella. I will give you everything I can, as long as you do no more than to love me in return."

She fell asleep like that, her arms around my neck with a grip which was quite tight for a human. Her body was leaning against mine with her head resting on one of my shoulders. Her face was turned so that her breath tickled my neck. The front of her body was meshed up against mine, no complaints from me there.

I didn't want to move her, in case she stirred and woke up but the beautiful heat and fragrance got a bit too much after a while. Carefully, I placed Bella back in her place in the middle of the bed. I lay down next to her, smiling faintly when she instantly turned and wrapped her arms around me. Like she didn't want to let go even in her consciousness.

I clung to her, equally as tight and eager.

--

--

I did nothing but hold on to Bella.

The bliss of the moment swelled up inside of me until I was smiling a big cheesy grin at a sleeping form and an empty room. Maybe it was because I had finally realised that I wasn't alone anymore. I wouldn't be wandering the earth aimlessly anytime soon. Maybe I would move in permanently with the Cullens.

Maybe it was because I had never felt something like this, and that I realised all the clichés about love was actually true. Your stomach really did turn pleasantly when you were next to her. You really did nothing but smile when you finally realised she was the one. She really did leave you breathless, eager and begging for more.

About an hour before the sun finally threatened to rise, I got up, making sure that Bella was still asleep. After wrapping her up with the blanket and convincing myself that she wouldn't roll over and hurt her arm – or any of her limbs for that matter – by falling off the bed, I decided to head out.

I jumped straight out of the window, instead of scaling down. Everyone was sleeping and no one would see me. As soon as my feet softly touched the ground, I began to run.

I hunted first – because with Bella it was better to be safe than sorry – making sure that my thirst was completely dulled down. Afterwards, I headed back to the Cullen household to change my clothes and get what I needed.

Esme and Carlisle greeted me first – mostly because they had been talking about me and I caught it in their thoughts – but I merely headed upstairs to the guest room Alice had suggested I occupy myself in whilst visiting the Cullens.

"Thank you", I murmured to Carlisle, knowing fully when he could hear it. He desperately tried to keep a block on his thoughts about my relationship with Bella. Though since he had been talking about it earlier, the conversation with Esme leaked out. "Thank you also, Esme. I also believe that Bella will do me good."

Rosalie, Emmett and Alice were not present for which I did not concern myself too much with. Jasper hovered into my room after me, heading straight to my drawer and pulling out the two items that I had really come here for.

Alice must've told him, I decided. Then made a mental note to thank her for getting Rosalie out of the house. I was not in the mood to listen to obnoxious comments.

_Alice sees you leaving_. Jasper looked at me meaningfully. No doubt he was sifting through my emotions so see what I was feeling. He frowned, finding nothing that would indicate any signs of departure.

Neither did I

"Alice is wrong", I muttered quietly, "I have no intention of leaving. I am content as I am right now. You and I both know that, Jasper."

"She doesn't when", he replied, _it could be in the future. A few weeks, perhaps? _"She saw it. She said she did."

I shrugged it off. "Does not matter right now. But thank you, I appreciate your concern for me."

"It isn't only for you, Edward", Jasper muttered quietly, "Alice will be more than distraught if you leave. Not to mention Esme. She considers you her son like Alice considers you her brother. It will no doubts affect Emmett, Rosalie and Carlisle too."

"Rosalie?" I raised an eyebrow. A faint smile tugged at his lips.

"Maybe not so much for Rosalie."

"Like I said, it matters not since I'm not leaving", I insisted, "Alice's visions change."

"Bella would be hurt", he added. _I met her. She was very much confused. Somehow her emotions weren't as hectic as one would think a teenage girl in her situation would be. Yet the confusion was still there._

"When did you meet her?" I asked, clearing my throat when I realised how possessive the question sounded.

"Yesterday. At the local library", Jasper answered, smiling, "Alice is planning on bringing Esme and Carlisle there too since you're taking too long to let them meet your mysterious girl."

I groaned softly in frustration.

"Hold her back, won't you? I'm getting to that bit", I said, taking the two velvety boxes from his hands. "Alice's planning will contradict with mine. Thank her on my behalf anyway."

_She says thank you_. He laughed.

Of course, Alice knew I would ask Jasper to thank her.


End file.
